The Ramblings of a Law Student

The Spiderman Hat

2008-07-11T14:04:00.001-07:00

I stopped by the Piggly Wiggly on my way back to the office after lunch today. I normally don’t like to shop there because they don’t always have what I want and because they’re not always very clean. However, I was running out of time, and it was on the way, so I stopped. Ugh, they didn’t have any organic spaghetti sauce, and their black beans weren’t with all the other beans so I almost didn’t find them, and they only had one size (itty bitty) of the cheese I wanted. By the time I was ready to check out I had gotten frustrated by this backwards small town store. Thoughts were racing through my head about the unavailability of the things I “need” and how much I missed Atlanta sometimes, and about how of all the teeth that should be in this store, there probably was only 75% of them present and accounted for.

Then I got to the check-out line and couldn’t help but smile. There was a little old man in front of me in line and he was wearing jeans, an old button-up shirt, suspenders, and this old camouflage cap that had spiderman’s face on it. I smiled because for Granddaddy’s last birthday we had thrown a Spiderman party, complete with streamers, noise-makers, and a card that said “Happy Birthday Super Hero!” when you opened it. I told him that I liked his hat and he thanked me and told me that he had found it. At that moment I just hoped that he meant he had “found it” in his garage and not just lying around somewhere.

We proceeded through the check-out line, as I listened to a woman ask another woman how her mother was doing. The old man paid for his groceries and started to walk out, but was greeted by a younger guy who must have known him because he flashed a big smile, and stopped to say hello. I heard him ask, “You doin’ awright?” and noted how genuine he was in his question. It wasn’t just another courtesy “How are you?” that is so often all we have time for. It was genuine, he truly wanted to know... which sounds like a simple thing, but it’s really not anymore. Sadly we don’t always have time to (or maybe we just don’t want to) really listen when people answer that question.

I paid for my groceries and got into my car. As I started it up I saw the old man walk out of the store. He stopped, pulled some money out of his wallet and stuffed it in the donation can just outside the door… the one sitting by a teenage girl who was holding a sign that said “Help the Fund for Abused Children.” As I walked into the store I had avoided eye contact with her, and as I walked out I had forgotten all about her and didn’t even notice her again as I walked by. But the little old man who was wearing the hat that he “found” had noticed and had given whatever was at the bottom of his pocket. My guess is that it was every bit of change that he just gotten back from his grocery purchase.

I pulled out of the parking lot and found myself hoping that this small town would rub off on me. I tend to think of myself as someone who appreciates the aspects of small town southern life, but this little experience had been a bit of an eye-opener, and one that frankly left me feeling somewhat ashamed. Clearly I haven’t been here long enough or I wouldn’t have been miffed about the absence of organic spaghetti sauce and I wouldn’t have avoided the eyes of someone who needed my help.

Looks like I still have a thing or two to learn about being “cultured.”

CHARGE!!

2008-02-17T00:23:00.000-08:00

Scott went to Birmingham this weekend to visit the guys and also to get his car checked out. I had a productive study weekend all by myself, and in just two short days I've observed two things:

1) I know I've said this before... but Scott makes me feel whole. I know that's really lame, but being in this house this weekend without him... i wouldn't say it felt empty... it just felt incomplete. In just a few short weeks, "my house" has become "our house" and his absence this weekend was noticeable. All weekend I've felt like one of those run-on sentences that goes on and on about nothing but never really gets to the point and never makes any sort of meaningful observation, but instead rambles and rambles about nothingness until you're grasping for a the nearest punctuation mark to bring some sort of closure to all of these half-hearted thoughts. Yeah, like one of those. Yeah, so I missed him. So what! I realize it was only 48 hours, but I missed him... and that's okay. I'm happy knowing that when my love is gone I notice the void. If I didn't notice, then I'd be worried.

2) I feel better about the bar exam (slightly). I had a pretty beneficial study day with a pal of mine from law school. Very smart guy, with an almost photographic memory... very good at picking up on things that get tested repeatedly. So it was productive. I feel a little more like this thing is doable... which is a long way from where I was Thursday night when I was up sobbing, vomiting, and convinced that "God doesn't want me to be a lawyer." Yeah, it was pretty rough... but I've decided this... He has never taken something from me that I thought I wanted without throwing me into another situation that I wouldn't have chosen by myself, without Him placing me there. And right now... I may not have gotten what I wanted, but I also haven't seen any indication that my path should vary. There have been no clues that my direction should change other than my own failure... my own shortcomings. So maybe this time God isn't allowing me to cling to my failure as "just His way of showing me where to go." Maybe God is tired of me using my failures as his signposts. Instead I should be a champion and use my victories as His signposts... and if there was no obstacle, then there would be nothing to champion. So my armor is on now... and I would like to think that I have never faced anything in my life without a hell of a fight... this should be no different.

Cruisin' for a Bruisin'

2008-01-29T14:22:00.001-08:00

Lots of big things happening these days.

Let’s see, first thing’s first… I just got back from an AWESOME cruise! My parents found this cruise and gave it to us for Christmas. The ship sailed out of Miami and went to Key West and Calica, Mexico. But who cares where it went, because the best part was being on the ship with all the bands!! About 10 bands performed almost constantly, including Lynyrd Skynyrd, Marshall Tucker Band, Georgia Satellites, and Cowboy Mouth!!! It was incredible! We had a great group with us too. It was my parents, their best friends from college, another couple they knew, and Mark and Lindsey even got to break away from Seattle.

A week later (see the whirlwind building?) Scott moved in. I have to admit I had been pretty nervous about this. Like I’ve said before, we were really hoping to be able to wait until we were married to live together, but I’m tired of waiting dangit! It sounds like plan is to be engaged in the next 6 months, and it just seemed so wasteful for Scott to find a lease for a year or maybe less, and for me to swing such a huge rent by myself, when we knew that we would be spending so much time at each other’s places anyway. Plus, the main thing that’s been holding back the engagement has been money, and I think we’ll really be able to save a bunch if we’re living together. At least that’s what my girl-math has told me. So anyway, we bit the bullet and moved him in.

I was also worried about how his presence would affect my studying. But so far, I’ve studied MORE with him there. Haha, now that could be partly due to him banishing me back to my desk every time I get distracted (hmmm, sounds like someone wants to make sure he’s not stuck paying off my student loans all by himself!). But I think it’s also because it’s been less stressful with him there, and so I’ve had more TIME to study. Now I have someone to help with the dishes, the laundry, controlling Attie, etc. I also don’t think I realized just how stressful it is to be away from the one you love. I hadn’t had to do it in a while and I guess I just forgot how hard it was. You’re constantly stressing about when you’re going to get to see him again, how you’re going to afford all this gas money you’re spending, why he hasn’t called yet, trying to find time to call HIM so that he’s not worrying about the same thing, blah blah blah, it’s just always something. So anyway, it’s been nice… really really nice. In fact as my married sister put it, “It’s kinda like everything has just fallen into place huh?” Yep, it’s exactly like that. Well said Lindsey.

Sittin' on the Dock of the Bay

2008-01-03T09:27:00.001-08:00

New Year's Eve was nice... really nice. Scott drove down on Sunday evening and grilled steaks... YUM! I had to work monday (blech!) but when I came home I had such a nice surprise waiting on me!! I had started painting my downstairs bathroom, but had run out of paint. When I came home, Scott had gone to Lowe's, bought more paint, and finished painting my bathroom for me! Yay! Plus he made copies of the house keys, cleaned up the kitchen and did the dishes from the night before (which I had left a WRECK), swept the entire downstairs, gotten out the leaf blower and blown off the back deck, replaced the light on the front porch, and set up the ipod docking thingy that he got me for Christmas! I was so excited. Everything was so clean and fixed and nice. I was VERY happy!

I thought I'd return the favor by making a yummy dinner. I had a craving for spinach dip, but didn't really have a recipe, so I just made one up and it turned out awesome. It had spinach (obviously) sauteed shallots and bacon, ricotta cheese, and feta cheese. Mmmmm! Then I made a Pizzagna that I saw rachel Ray make the week before. It was good too, and Scott says both recipes were difinitely "going in the lineup."

We debated going out for the evening. Neither of us wanted to fight crowds, traffic, but we also didn't want to just sit at home. We decided on a movie. Sounds lame, and maybe it was since wew were probably the only people at the theater who were under the age of 55, but we hadn't been to a movie just the two of us in a while, so Iw as kind of excited. We saw "Charlie Wilson's War." Excellent movie! Everyone should see it.

We left the theater about 11 and went home to get champagne and our 2008 flutes that Mom had given us for Christmas. We headed to a small, secluded pier that I had come across a few weeks ago. It overlooked the bay, and you could see the lights of Mobile on the other side. It was the perfect spot to watch fireworks, snuggle, and get a midmight kiss.
Haha, then we came home, drank the rest of the champagne, and watched "Family Guy" till about 2:30. Like I said... not the most exciting night... but really nice and even a little romantic :-) I'm starting to get even more excited about him comign down here. Oh, and I'm starting to get really really really excited about our cruise next week!!

Mind the Gap

2007-12-28T09:08:00.000-08:00

Well… it’s been a long time since my last entry, and a lot has happened. First things first… some good news and some bad news. Bad news: Scott lost his job. UGH! I know! I’m soooo tired of this happening to him, and to us. I feel terrible for him, because he really worked hs ass off at this job. He was always working late, and working weekends and going the extra mile for the customer. He TRIPLED the profits in that shop within a month of being there, and kept them that way the whole time. He was turning out computers much faster than the last guy. He really gave it his all, and I think that makes it worse because now he feels like even his best wasn’t good enough. And why was he fired? We don’t even know!! His boss just walked up to him one afternoon and said “So I’ve decided to let you go. I’m just not happy. I’ll take your cell phone and your key card now.” And that was it!! That was all he said to him!! Can you believe that?!? Scott was in shock. Then I think he got pretty down on himself, and now he’s moving into the pissed off stage. Although, if you really get him to talk about it, he’s still pretty down on himself… feeling pretty worthless.

So, that’s the bad news. The good news though, the sort of silver lining, is that he’ll be moving down here sooner than expected. He was waiting until the end of his lease to move, which would be at the beginning of March. We had talked a couple of times about him moving down early, but he didn’t want to because he wanted to rack up as much time with this job as possible before his lease ran out. But now that the job is gone, there’s really nothing keeping him in Birmingham, so he’s going to move down here in a few weeks.

Where’s he living you ask? With me. And I really have mixed feelings about it. For the longest time I have said that I didn’t want to live together until we were married. I just felt like that was one of the “sacred” things that came with marriage, and I just wanted to keep it special. There’s a certain intimacy that you get from living with someone, and I guess I was just hoping that would be something that we could wait to experience until we were husband and wife. And when I say “intimacy”, no, I’m not talking about sex. Scott and I have made certain commitments concerning that. Those commitments didn’t change when we started staying with each other more often and they won’t change once we’re officially living together. I mean the intimacy that comes from spending THAT much time with someone. I don’t know, maybe I’m making too much of a deal out of it. We’ve been together for six years… as much as I’ve stayed at his place during that time, I know how he lives. There shouldn’t really be fights over dirty dishes, sleep habits, or other things you argue about when you first start living together, because there shouldn’t really be any surprises in that area. But I’m still kind of sad about not being able to save this experience until we’re married.

I feel like I kind of have to get over that though. I mean, when we were in Birmingham, we stayed together probably 3 nights a week, and it would probably be more now that he wouldn’t have roommates. So I just feel like it’s ridiculous to pay for two separate places when we’d be spending that much time together. It’s just STUPID financially. My other concern (and I feel SO superficial for even having this concern) is what other people will think, particularly my family and anyone at work that might find out. By the way, Christel, Anu , and Monica… mum’s the word at the office or you’ll be sorry! See, this is why I don’t like to let co-workers be my myspace friends… but ANYWAY. I’m not worried about my parents, they’re fine with it, surprisingly. I’m more worried about family members like my grandparents. I mean, how do I look my Grandaddy in the eye and refer to that house as “ours” and not feel like he thinks I’m a huge skank?

I feel bad now, because this sounds like I’m not excited about Scott moving in, which isn’t true. I’m ecstatic!! I can’t wait to be able to have him around all the time, to not have to miss him everyday because I know I’ll get to see him that night.I can’t wait for us to start forging out our own routines and traditions. Oooooh, and I can’t WAIT to never have to do laundry again!! Scott thinks he does it better and has insisted that I relinquish my laundry duties to him. As you can imagine, I didn’t put up much of a fight… “You’re right babe, I SUCK at laundry!! You should totally do it all so I don’t mess up our clothes.”

Okay, so that’s what’s new on the Scott front. How about my Christmas and Thanksgiving? They were both nice, but somehow didn’t feel real… especially Thanksgiving. I think part of it is because Lindsey was stuck working in Seattle and couldn’t come home for either one. The other part I think (and you’re going to think this is really stupid) is that I’m not in school anymore. I mean, for the last 21 years of my life (since I started school) Christmas has been marked with nearly a whole month off! That really gives you a lot of time to relax and star getting excited about it. There’s time to shop for gifts, plan the perfect menu, and tons of time for family and friends. I would have so much time to spend with my parents, that I would have spare time…enough so that I could spend time with Scott’s family and even seen friends that I hadn’t seen in a long time. But now that I’m working there was just no time for any of that. The shopping got accomplished after work, when I was already tired and didn’t feel like fighting crowds, and when I felt guilty for being out shopping when I should be at home studying. And when I finally DID get time off, it felt like a whirlwind. Instead of a long Thanksgiving or Christmas break… I felt like I had just gotten a long weekend. It just wasn’t the same. This probably wouldn’t bother me nearly as much if I thought this was a temporary state. But it’s not. This is final. I know that this is the way it’s going to have to be from now on... and I don’t like it. I feel SO immature for having these thoughts. It makes me sound like I don’t want to grow up... and maybe that’s the case. But I think it’s more that I don’t want to disconnect from the things I enjoy. I talked to Scott about it some over Christmas break. He just said that we’re getting to a point where it just won’t be possible for us to spend as much time with our friends and extended family. He said that we’re going to have to lean on each other more and let one another be enough, and fill that gap that’s missing for me right now. That will be nice, because I don't like the gap i'm feeling right now. this will probably be much easier for us once we get back in the same city again. He also said maybe we should just know to hoard our vacation days every year so that we can take an extra long vacation at Christmas so that I’ll always feel Christmas-y. That’s probably a good idea, because I don’t think I can do another whirlwind Christmas.

Happy Birthday to ME!!!

2007-10-29T12:43:00.000-07:00

So my birthday was pretty great. One of the best I’ve had in years I think. One of my cousins, Brian, was getting married on Saturday so my parents were already coming down for the wedding. Scott came in Friday night. He doesn’t close the shop till 5, so I was expecting him in around 8:30 or 9:00. I had planned to help my Aunt Agnes with the rehearsal dinner and get finished about the time Scott got to my house. Well guess what, Scott got Jeremy to close up for him, and Scott was able to leave around 3. When I got home from the rehearsal dinner he was already at my house and had put up streamers all over the downstairs and a “happy birthday” sign on the fireplace mantle. If you know Scott, you know that surprising me like this is a BIG deal. He hates surprises for himself and so isn’t very good at making surprises for other people. Plus, his family never made a big deal out of birthdays growing up... haha, so he thinks my family is crazy for celebrating our “birthday week” like we do. But anyways, it was a wonderful surprise.

We spent the evening eating take-out, snuggling and watching movies in bed. It was nice. The next day we got up and met my parents, and Aunt Pam and Uncle Don at this really fancy restaurant on the causeway for lunch. Aunt Pam and Uncle Don were celebrating their anniversary, so we all got free deserts... YUMmmmm!! Everyone else went back to the hotel downtown for the afternoon, but Scott and I went back to my house to rest and watch the GA-Fla game. Goooooo Dawgs!!! We won 42-30!! TI was a great game to watch. We also stopped in at a few furniture stores, because Scott ahd decided he wanted to buy me a sofa-table for my birthday present. We didn’t see anything we really loved though, so we’re going to look some more when I’m in Birmingham this weekend. Then Scott and I got dressed up to head downtown for the wedding reception.

This reception was GORGEOUS!!! It as at the bride’s step-father’s house that overlooked Dog River. There was a long pier, and when the full moon came out from behind the cloud it lit up the water and almost seemed like it was daytime. There were lights strung and a huge tent with delicious food, a black & white dance floor put down on the grass by the water, and a really great band! My whole family was there… and I’ve said this before... Jordan family functions are FUN!!! Everyone was dancing and laughing, and drinking… it was a really good time. And I have to say, I’m a sucker for dancing with Scott to “Wonderful Tonight”… gets me every time.

After the reception we all went back to my parents’ and aunt/uncle’s hotel and hung out in he lobby forever just drinking and talking and laughing. Scott and I went home about 2am... and my parents stayed up till 4am!!! Yep, I got out-partied by my 54 and 55 year old parents… oh well. I guess that makes me feel better about getting older, haha, it doesn’t seem to be slowing them down any!! Dad and I had talked about going dove hunting the next afternoon with my cousins Jeffrey, Michael, Chad, and Uncle Doug. Haha, but Dad and Uncle Doug weren’t really in any shape to go… maybe next weekend!

Tempered Steel

2007-10-01T19:31:00.001-07:00

Soooo Friday I got some bad news.... yep, it just keeps coming. I found out I didn't pass the bar exam. I can't even tell you the shock and disappointment I felt. I wouldn't even be writing about it on here if it weren't for the fact that everyone already knows. Yeah, thanks for that one AL Bar Association! Would it really have killed you to wait a little bit before adding all the names to the directory so that my failure could be searched out by anyone and everyone who cared to know? I was/am so embarrassed, and the fact that I'm embarrassed just makes me feel shallow for putting so much stock in what others think.

I had quit crying by the end of the day on Friday. Scott tried to get the day off work so that he could stay home and be with me, but they wouldn't let him. So I sat alone in my house, packing to move to Mobile for a job in a profession that now feels so incredibly unattainable. So many things have gone through my head lately. I spent that morning trying to decide if this was God's way of telling me I shouldn't be a lawyer. I’ve decided that I don’t think that’s what he’s trying to say to me… but it did make me seriously question, and that’s really scary.

After a couple days I kind of shifted from feeling mostly embarrassed to just sad. I worked so hard…. SO hard… and it just hurts to know that all that work means nothing. I tried to minimize my distractions, to only focus on studying. I even sent Attie home to stay with my parents for the last three weeks so that I could spend more time at the library. I tried to schedule my time, and set mini-goals. I used every study aid I could get my hands on without going completely insane or starting to feel the effects of losing sleep. I failed. And it just hurts SO much to know that I wasn’t able to do something that I put my mind to. I’ve gotten used to not being able to make my body do the things I want it to… I’ve learn to accept that no matter how hard I try, there are some physical goals that I will never meet. But this is new for me… it was mental. I’ve never faced anything that I wasn’t able to make my mind do. I feel stupid, I really do. Of course I know logically that I’m not stupid… but it sure does feel that way. I walked into work this morning and for the first time felt like I didn’t belong… like I was somehow unworthy.

So, what’s the next step? Well, I can take the exam again in February. That’s a long time to wait, but I guess on the upside, that’s a long time to study. I guess the other good news is that I know where I need to work. My essays were fine… but my score on the multiple choice part was pretty bad. I knew all along that if I failed, that would be the part that did it to me. I kept getting bad scores on every practice test I took. No matter what I did, I just couldn’t bring it up. So that’s definitely where I need to focus. Also, I only missed the cut of by a few points, which is SO frustrating!

I’m doing better today than I was on Friday, that’s for sure. I’ve gotten a lot of good advice from people. Dad gave me this whole speech about tempered steel and how they make steel stronger by putting it in the furnace for a while, then beating the hell out of it until all the molecules are bunched together, then they stick it in the furnace again and do the same thing until the steel is as strong as it needs to be. Apparently this is just the part of the process where I’m getting the hell beat out of me. Lindsey (sister) said “You shouldn’t let some test measure you. You know what you’re good at. Be your own measure.” And Scott pointed out that even thought he knows I’m sad and embarrassed and disappointed, that not passing doesn’t wreck any of our plans. Luckily my job wasn’t contingent on passing, (and the people there have been wonderful about the whole thing… telling me just to let them know if there’s anything they can do to help get me ready for February), I’m still moving to Mobile, he’ll still be moving down in March so we can be together, we’ll still keep to our plan, and most of all he still loves me.

Mike told me that he’s comforted by the fact that I’m “incredibly tough,” so that’s what I’m trying to be… mostly because I don’t have a choice. I still want this for myself, I still want to practice law. I still believe that I have talents that are meant to be used for something special. And Mike was right… if someone had told me before I started law school that it would be extra hard for me, and that I would hit these bumps and would have to keep going… I still would have gone.

But yeah… so if you’d heard the rumor that I failed, it’s true. And yes, I was devastated… as anyone would have been. But I’m doing better, I’m trying not to think about the fact that I’m still not a “real lawyer” like all my friends. I’ll get there eventually, I will. Haha, and man when I do, I guess I’ll know a hell of a lot of law because guess what… I did this crap TWICE!!!

third time's a charm

2007-09-28T23:15:00.000-07:00

September 6, 2007 - Thursday

YAAAAY!!! My cousin, Paige, is pregnant again! Sorry for the delay in telling all you guys… We've known for a week, but she didn't want to announce it until the doctor confirmed it. This will be Paige's third child. I'm so excited for her! No doubt it will be very hard to have three kids, especially since their ages are so close together. When the baby comes, Maddox will be 2 and Maggie will be 4. But Josh and Paige will make it work… I have no doubt.

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Man, it seems like everyone I know is pregnant right now. The funny part is that I used to say that about everyone I know getting married! I sometimes feel like I've been left behind in this department. I mean, Scott and I have been discussing getting engaged more and more these days, and I have a pretty good idea of when he's going to ask (and it's sooner than you might think girls!!!), but I still sometimes look around and feel like everyone's left me in the dust. Don't get me wrong, I love my life the way it is now. I'm not ready for a family. But does that make me less of a person?

I have a guy friend (M) who's married and he said that when all of their married friends started having babies they sort of got shut out. The new parents didn't really want to hang out with them anymore. I can sort of see how this might happen… the new parents think there's not much their old friends can offer them any more… think that their old friends just won't understand this new role in their life, so why bother remaining friends? M said this really hurt him and his wife so they've made a conscious effort to remain friends with single people too. He doesn't want to make another person feel the way he did by not nurturing a friendship with them simply because this person wouldn't be able to relate to his marriage. Haha, and as a result the two of them have a ..:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" />LOT of single friends!! J I've been very fortunate not to have encountered this same problem that M did, and I hope I never do. But I've heard of a number of other couples and singles who have had this problem… their friends move onto different stages in their lives and for whatever reason think they can no longer relate. The whole thing makes me think about balance. I recently read a book that was encouraging mothers to remain close with their single/childless friends. The author spoke of having a balanced life and told the reader that while you need your "mommy friends" to help you with this new role (because let's face it, to a certain extent non-mothers will NEVER understand what motherhood is like until they live it), you also need you single/childless friends to cultivate the other part of you… the person that existed before you were ever a wife or a mother. It's sort of like what I was talking about the other day… how I would like to get to know my grandmother in the sense of "Mary Litchfield," and not just Amanda's grandma, or Walter mom, or Barney's wife… but more who SHE is. And while taking on new roles in your life will certainly change you, it's important to cultivate I guess… sort of the nucleus of yourself… and that makes how you operate in these roles that much better.

I've been lucky enough to watch a few good examples of this balance being maintained. For example, I went out with Paige and Elizabeth for Paige's birthday the other weekend. Now here we had three different stages in life… me: left behind as we've already discussed… Elizabeth: newlywed of just a few months… and Paige: married for 5 years and already had 2 kids. Keep in mind we're all the same age here people!! And yet, I could still see Elizabeth and Paige slipping back to their high school memories and it was nice to see them still being just Paige and Elizabeth… still loving the same music still willing to knock someone out for the other one. Paige and I are still the same girls who would sneak out of the bedroom at night, leave my sister in there asleep, and stay up talking "big girl talk." Yeah sure, we all have new responsibilities now… but that hasn't necessarily changed who we are. Another example… Jennifer. Engaged, then married, then expecting all within a couple months… talk about a role change! And yet, seeing her standing at the Georgia game I know she's still the same south Georgia girl who had the tequila ready when I needed to "disinfect" my mouth, the same girl who ran to a guy friend's house with me to stay on the night of 9/11 because we were scared, the same girl who'll be shouting Go Dawgs till the day she dies!

I think this kind of balanced life is much harder to maintain than you would think. I've been lucky enough to see people who have made it work… and others who haven't. I just hope that when my time for balance comes, I'll be in the first group.

limbo - not always a fun dance with a stick

2007-08-31T12:17:00.001-07:00

Bad day today... REALLY bad day. I won't go into the details here because I probably don't need to announce this to the world. Suffice it to say, life has been turned upside down.. AGAIN. And by the way, i'd really love to get to the point where this whole "heart condition" horse shit didn't screw up my life every time I turned around. I try to tell myself there are blessings that come with it, and I know that there are,... but on a day like today... I'm just TIRED of it. I don't like being controlled.. not by others, and CERTAINLY not by the constraints of my own body!

Hell, even if it only affected my physical capabilities I'd learn to deal with that... but I'm learning more and more that it just touches everything... that every ascpect of my life is "disabled." This blows.

rethinking "working for the weekend"

2007-08-21T13:15:00.000-07:00

Well I finally made it down to the beach, although it was seriously the most drama-filled beach trip EVER!! I’m still not sure if us “kids” being older made the trip more dramatic, or if it was always that dramatic and we were all just too young to realize. For starters, we had TWO trips to the emergency room, and should have had one more, but Dad was being stubborn and refused to go. One of the guys we went with got dehydrated… he had just walked up from the beach with another man from our crew to eat in a restaurant with beach access and ended up collapsing and passing out. Had to call 911 and they spent the afternoon in the ER. Dad got “over-heated” on the boat while a group was out on the Gulf fishing with my Uncle Don. Dad claims the heat just got to him, but I know his diabetes had more to do with it than he was letting on. He’s SOO bad about taking care of his diabetes, and it makes me so sad and angry at the same time. I don’t really know what else to do about it though because every time I try to talk to him about it we just end up arguing and he doesn’t change his behavior anyway. I even tried “going on strike” with my heart medicine once until he started eating better…ummmm, yeah you can just imagine how that didn’t end so well for me. It just REALLY made him angry, and like always, I saw no change in his behavior. But I could go on forever about Dad’s health. The last injury was my mom, who slipped on the walk as she was running in from the beach when it had started raining. She cut her elbow really bad. The ER doc wanted to put in stitches, but Mom whined enough (she does NOT do pain) that he finally agreed to just wrap it really well and put a splint on it if she promised not to move it for 2 days. He said, “My gosh, with this kind of pain tolerance how in the world did you have children??” She replied, “Yeah…. I didn’t do so well with that either.”

On the whole, the trip was fun though. I spent most of my time with Mark and Lindsey (sister and her husband), which was nice since they left for Seattle yesterday. I think I’ve told most of you this, but Mark is going to a graduate school there, so they’ve moved, and they SAY they’ll move back in 2 years. I don’t know though, that’s what my parents said 30 years ago when they moved to Atlanta.

ANYWAY, after the beach I headed to Grandma’s. This will be my third summer with her and Granddaddy and you would think I would find it soooo boring, but I really don’t. I mean it gets boring sometimes, and of course I miss being able to call up a friend and go do something, but mostly I’m just really enjoying my time with them. And, for all of you in blog land, you know what me staying with them means for you right?? More installments of “Grandma Stories!!” I swear, I never stop laughing around this woman, and as soon as I get another chance I’ll start logging all of the things she does so you can laugh as much as I have been. It looks like Granddaddy may be appearing in some of the stories this time too! Sunday I spent the afternoon out in the shop with him, sipping beer and listening to him tell me about his days in the Army. You have to catch him at certain times of the day for him to be alert enough to remember a whole lot and be able to recount it for you, but when you do he’s really a fascinating guy. Or at least I think so.

So my first weekend in Saraland, AL was fairly exciting, or at least it was pleasant. Friday night my Aunt Pam and Grandma and I went and had some dinner and drinks. We stopped off at the Blockbuster, rented a couple movies, and watched them until we fell asleep. (Haha, which for both of them was pretty early) Saturday morning we all left and drove down to the beach. One nice thing about living in Mobile is that the beach is only an hour away, so you can make a day of it pretty much all the time. We didn’t do anything special, just sat on the beach for a while, walked, and got in the ocean some. Grandma stayed in the condo for a good part of the day napping. Then we all walked down the beach for dinner… coincidentally, it was the same place that our friend had collapsed in the week before. Then we drove home around 9:30 and were all in bed by 11. Sunday was spent listening to stories from Granddaddy (like I said earlier), grocery shopping with Grandma, and swimming in Aunt Pam’s pool. I’ve been trying to go to bed early lately since I have to be up at 6:15 to make it to work on time, but so far I can’t make myself go to bed before 11:30. Hopefully that will get better. The swimming at night has helped.

Other than a lack of sleep, work has been going well. Everyone here is just as nice as ever. That’s one thing I learned last summer… I used to think my area of practice was the most important thing when searching for a job. But I’ve quickly learned that what you’re working on isn’t nearly as important as who you’re working with. Don’t get me wrong, I really enjoy the area of law I’m in now, but actually enjoying the company of people in the offices next to me… well there’s nothing better than that. One thing that’s scaring me a little though is this: Having just taken the bar exam, you’d think I’d be at my peak as far as the legal knowledge I possess, and if you talk to a lot of attorneys, they’ll tell you that’s the case… that they don’t know nearly as much now as they did when they took the bar exam. This is mostly because once an attorney gets settled in his area of practice they really don’t look at other subject areas for sometimes years. So anyway, I feel like I should know a lot more than I do, and yet I’m realizing that there’s still sooooooo much for me to learn. I’m taking comfort though, in the fact hat I seem to be much fast on my project completion than last year. So far I’ve already completed 4 of the 7 assignments I’ve been given. I can tell I’m spotting the issues more quickly, processing documents faster and coming up with answers that are more on point. I think I have an opportunity to really grow as an attorney here, so I’m trying to keep my eyes and ears wide open and learn as much as possible. My friend Mike (who’s clerking with an AL Supreme Court Justice right now) said last night, “I’ve decided you can’t really ‘work for the weekend’ in this job. There are a lot of days between Monday and Friday, and if you’re only looking forward to the weekend you’re gonna get really bored. You have to be looking forward to the next day at work.” I feel blessed that looking forward to the next day at work is actually a possibility for me! So many people get stuck in jobs they hate, and while I may have that problem somewhere down the line, I’m just so glad not to have it right now.

Beach Bound

2007-08-06T12:17:00.000-07:00

Well, my week of doing nothing has come to an end, and (sigh) now i am FORCED to go to the beach. Haha, just kidding. I know, I know, you want to just slap me for suggesting that going to the beach could ever be a bad thing. Of course I'm excited about going to the beach, it'll be nice and relaxing, I'll get to see lots of old friends, lots of family too, and maybe even go fishing, (which i LOVE). But all kidding aside, as excited as I am to go to the beach, I'm sad to leave Scott. Because it's not just that I'm leaving him for a week at Gulf Shores, I'm leaving for the beach and not coming back for a while because I'll head straight to Mobile to start work. The plan is that Scott will eventually follow to Mobile, but probably not for at least 6 months. And yes, we'll get to see each other on the weekends, but weekend visits probably won't be able to start for three weeks.

Okay, before anyone throws anything at me please know that I DO realize that I'm being a big baby. I know that are plenty of people that are apart for WAY longer than 3 weeks, and that for me to complain about it borders on ridiculous. But knowing in my head that things could be so much worse and that i'm being ridiculous doesn't make me miss Scott any less. We've done distance before (for about 2 years) and we were fine... but it sucked then and it's gonna suck now too.

I've gotten spoiled having him so close, and I know that it will take some adjusting to get used to only seeing him on occasion. I just hope I don't allow my "adjusting" to ruin my beach trip. Now THAT would be stupid!! But yeah, I've put off leaving for the beach for a while now. I was supposed to leave Friday, but then I put it off till Sunday, and then last night I decided I just wanted one more evening with him, so I put it off till this morning. And here it is 2pm, and I STILL haven't left Scott house. He's not even here!! but I can't bring myself to get on the road. I guess I better go though, seeing as how "update my blog" was the last thing on my list of things I had convinced myself had to be done before I left.

OH OH!! But check out the pic of me that may be coming out in the next DG Anchora!! http://www.deltagamma.org/news_to_note.shtml

Post -Exam

2007-08-06T12:16:00.001-07:00

Wednesday, August 01, 2007

YAY!!!!! The bar exam is over!!!

I finished a week ago today actually, wow, I can't believe it's been that long already. My first order of business was to start crying. I wasn't sad or upset, I think I had just bottled up my emotions for so long that as soon as the test was over they just all came crashing down on me. I finally let myself feel a release of stress and thus the tears. But it felt sooo good to cry. To know that it was finally over and that I could take the time to experience the rest of my day to day life and not worry about how many practice question I could have gotten through while I was busy talking to friends, cleaning, playing with attie, etc.

After the party at Mike's I think all I did for 2 days was sleep. I didn't realize how mentally and physically exhausted I was. Then Scott, Jeremy, and I all drove to Nashville to see Katy (Scott's sis) and attend Nashville's Brewfest. So much fun! then I drove to Atlanta to spend a couple days with the folks and pick up Attie.

So here's what I'm looking at now... I star work in Mobile on the 13th. The previous week I'll be at the beach with my family and three other families that we used to vacation with every summer, so it's sort of like a reunion. I leave for the beach on Sunday. So until SUnday I have FREE TIME, and I kinda don't know what to do with myself. I have a few things I need to accomplish, but I also know that I need to take this time to relax as much as possible before I start work So here are the things I wana do with myself:

spend time with scott, i'd like to tak him lunch to work every day this week
WORKOUT!!!
tan
clean house
clean out the car
mani/pedi
play with attie, maybe take her to the lake or hiking
clean out all my old class outlines and figure out which ones i wanna keep
shop for more suits for work
see a movie
read harry potter
try some different recipes out on the boys
organize pictures on computer
pack for Mobile

I think the main thin I'm excited about though is that while I have a "to do list," I don't really have any priority on it, I'll just do each thing as I feel like doing it, which is soooooo nice. And i will play MUSIC on my stereo instead of civil litigation lectures, YAY!!!!

i love scott

2007-07-17T23:00:00.002-07:00

It came to my attention the other day just how much I beleive Scott loves me and just how much I love him.

I had stayed at his place and he had gone to sleep about an hour before I did. I got into bed and was trying to drift off to sleep and suddenly it hit me how soon the exam was. At this point I had just 9 days until the test (by the way right now i only have 5... eek!). All of a sudden i was wide awake, the walls felt like they were rushing in on me and I sat up in bed, breathing really fast, almost to the point that I hyperventilated. Within seconds Scott was awake wanting to know what was wrong. I replied "nothing." (Haha, which by the way ladies, I've now been informed that if you're gasping for air and your man wnats to know what's wrong, "nothing" is apparently NOT a sufficient answer) He finally got it out of me that I was just stressing about the exam and for him to go back to bed. He held me as I tried to go to sleep. And as he drifted back to sleep, he mumbled "Don't worry baby, if you don't pass I'll just break in and change the scores." OF COURSE this was a joke, and of course I would never ask him to do that, but it got me thinking... I really can't think of anything at all that Scott wouldn't at least TRY to do for me, and that is a REALLY good feeling. I lay there thinking about it some more, and I finally concluded that, in turn, I couldn't think of anything that I wouldn't do for him... also a REALLY good feeling. I know that I should really count my blessings to have foudn someone that I love SO much, and that loves me SO much, that the other comes before all wants and desires of ourselves... that no task is unimaginable if it would make the other happy.

These last few months with Scott have been especially enjoyable, and I'm excited about the path our relationship is about to take.

As I lay in bed thinking about all of this, I really started feelings so much calmer about the bar exam. Now don't get me wrong, i still feel liek there's a GOOD chance that I won't pass... but it finally hit me that, "so what?!?!" If I fail I'll still have this great love that's beside me. And if I fail I'll still have wonderful family and friends. And if I fail, I'll still get to be a lawyer... it just might be on a slightly delayed timetable. So, for now I'll keep studying my brains out and know that the truly important things in my life are not going to be altered by this stupid test.

yay I got flowers!!! :-)

2007-07-17T23:00:00.001-07:00

WEDNESDAY, JULY 11

Wow. I really have the best parents ever... EVER! They know I'm really having a hard time right now, and I told mom about my little freak out in the auditorium. So today when I got home there were flowers waiting on me. My mom has always been a fan of sending flowers, and they just NEVER get old... they alwaysmake you feel better. And they're SO pretty... stargazer lillies mostly and carnations... they just really brighten my study room and desk. OKay.. back to my practice test. Later Gator Haters!!

mike's eternal wisdom

2007-07-11T16:05:00.000-07:00

Mike's vast wisdom never ceases to amaze me.

"If you laugh a lot, keep your man fed, and keep him laid... you will never lose him."
~Mike

starting to freak

2007-07-10T22:55:00.001-07:00

I HAVE to get control of myself. I'm starting to let the fear take over and that's NOT gonna get me ready for this thing. This morning I was sitting in a review session and just got so overcome with anxiety about this exam that I had to get up and leave. Just walked right out of the auditorium... from the front row. It was highly embarrassing but I just couldn't handle thinking about this stuff anymore... worked myslef into a tizzy and then ran out. I was THIS close to just bursting into tears, so it was either 1) leave or 2) just start balling on the front row in front of all my classmates. Ugh! Like a child! It probably didn't help that I was up till 2 trying to take a practice exam, and then up at 7. That probably just made me all the more emotional.

I'm trying to keep an even head, but so many things have me upset these days. bar prep of course, but other stuff too. The really bad part is that when I have a problem I like to try to face it head on... confront it, solve it and move on. But I don't feel like I can do that right now. I know that I have to just turn off my emotions for the next 2 weeks because I can't afford to get bogged down in being sad or frustrated. But have you ever tried to truly "turn off" your emotions? Its sooooo hard. To maintain your tunnel vision so that you ignore the things and people that you hold dear so that you can focus on what is more urgent... not what is more important... but more urgent.

The other hard part is that I feel like I have no support system, which really isn't anybody's fault. But all of my loved ones are sort of in two camps: law students and the lucky ones. All my law student friends are having their own freak outs, so it's not like they can stop what they're doing to fix me. And those that aren't going through this with me right now... of course they understand what it's like to be stressed about an exam, but i can't really talk strategy, or about what specifically has me spooked. (By the way, Jada, yes I realize you are in neither of these camps, and for that reason you are my lifeline. Thanks babe!)

Anyway, It's hard but I know there's really nothing I can do but buckle down and get through it. Turn off my emotions, keep my head down, and then re-introduce myself to the world on July 26. Until then I will try not to let something like spilling coffee on my sweater this morning make me want to go throw myself down a flight of stairs! :-(

2007-07-08T22:53:00.000-07:00

Though God loved me from my outset simply because I was, I have since altered this perfect being and I am now a shell of that beginning. Instead of who I was, instead of His perfection, I have become who I am. In my quest to follow Him in hopes of becoming a better version of myself, the goal is not to move forward to what I might become, but rather to move backward. Because perfection is behind me, in His creation. It was solely my actions that wrecked this utopian start.

Stopping in my tracks may be the best course of action. Like when you cease the struggle to make it out past the breakers. your stillness gives way to weakness and you are thrown down and swept back toward the shore.

Once I realize the shore is not the origin, but instead should be my destination... that the certainty His sand provided was a good and perfect thing... then perhaps I will not be so combative toward the tide's control. And I will let it take me back to what I was... so very long ago before I thought I knew how to swim.

dear committee for amanda's sanity...

2007-07-06T18:22:00.000-07:00

my bar admission ticket came in the mail last week. They told us to put it somewhere safe. I put mine in the porcelain flower basket on my bookshelf in the front room. The one that has attie's leash in it too. Just thought I'd tell you all so that when you see/hear me freaking out the day before the exam becuase I can't find my ticket, you'll know where to tell me to look. Thanks again for your continuing suport of my sanity. I know it is a big job!!

Love,
amanda

bar exam i think i hate you

2007-06-25T00:08:00.000-07:00

bar exam i think i hate you

Bar Exam,

How do I loathe thee? Let me count the ways:

1. Contracts
2. Property
3. Torts
4. Criminal
5. Evidence
6. Constitutional Law
7. Agency and Partnership
8. Commercial Paper
9. Conflict of Laws
10. Corporations
11. Family Law
12. Wills
13. Secured Transactions
14. Trusts
15. Federal Civil Procedure
16. Alabama Civil Procedure
17. Alabama Civil Litigation and Remedies

SEVENTEEN!!! Seventeen areas of law in three days!?!? This was the realization I came to this weekend. I'm starting to freak out a little. I couldn't even manage all of this material in the three YEARS I have been in law school!! How am I going to get all of this packed into my head? I don't test well, and I read slow, which makes getting through all the questions in time hard. Bar-Bri ran a simulated test day yesterday... just the multiple choice day, not the essay part. I did NOT do well. I'm starting to really get scared, and the problem is there's not any way to get rid of the fear. Those who know what I'm going through are dealing with their own fears right now because they have to take this thing too.. so they can't really help. Besides, what are they gonna say? There's nothing to say that will make this better. The only thing that will make it better is more studying, and that's just sooooo painful. I feel like everyone is way ahead of me and doing better on the practice tests. I'm starting to really get scared that I'm gonna fail this thing. I can't get focused... distracted by life I guess. It seems as if every area of my life has drama in it right now. Things that have me worried and bothered. I know what my Mom would tell me... "You can't worry about those things right now. You have to turn that side of your mind off for a month and muscle though what HAS to be done. You've come too far to blow it now." And I know she would be right. It's just really hard to turn off emotions... to ignore what you want right now... to be able to discern between what's important and what's urgent and know that urgency has to take precedence over importance right now. I hate this. And what worries me the most is that I'll endure two months of this... hating it all the whle... only to fail the exam and have to hate my life until February when I can take it again.

just another weekend

2007-06-16T13:39:00.001-07:00

Ever have those times when you look at your man and think "Damn, I am so lucky to have him"? I had one of those moments the other day. There was no big gesture or anything, it's just the little things. He's so swett and says the cutest things to make me smile, especially when I'm feeling stressed. If I'm being moody, instead of arguing with me he'll call a timeout, throw me on the bed and tickle me till the bad mood goes away. I balance a lot of things in my life and I often get down on myself for not accomplishing everything I had planned on, or disappointing a friend, or just being too busy to go have a good time. It's nice to have someone in my life that will make me stop what I'm doing and just smile for a while.

I'm starting to get in the swing of things with studying for the bar. Class from 9-12:30ish... then I try to hit the gym or run some errands. Then study more in the afternoon and into the evening. Today I'm listening to property CDs while cleaning the house... how sad is it that it makes me so happy to multi-task? Once I've listened to the 9 hours of CDs I'll try to do some multi-state questions and tomorrow I'll hit up some essays.

I've been trying to go to the gym more lately, I can really tell a difference in my energy level on days that I go to the gym. Also Jeremy and Scott are playing softball with me now on the Cumberland team. It's really nice to have a set time every week that I can spend time with Scott, and I like it even more since it's an outside activity where we can run around together.

Mom and Dad come back from Italy on Monday. I'm kinda sad about not being with Dad on Father's Day but I guess there's nothing aI can do about it. Scott and I are gomma try to go home next weekend though. I'm looking forward to seeing both of my parents.

back to day care

2007-06-11T21:35:00.001-07:00

I went to day care almost immediately after I was born. My parents both worked, so that was pretty much the only option. Lindsey and I both went there until I was in the 2nd grade, and then we started staying with a lady my parents knew. Anyway, I remember most everything from my day care days and i LOVED it!! I don't ever remember crying when mom or dad would leave us there in the morning, but I was always really glad to get picked up in the evening.

I started thinking about this today when I was thinking about how much I've missed my parents this past week. They're both in Italy right now celebrating their 30th wedding anniversary (go them!!). Well technically, they're not in Italy, they're taking a Mediterranean cruise so their probably on the ocean somewhere right now. Anyway, they left for Rome almost a week ago, and it has just been PATHETIC how much I miss them, It's not like I live clsoe to them or even get to go home and visit that much, I guess the big thing is not beingable to talk to them liek I usually do. I talk to both of them AT LEAST once a day.

So I've just been kinda bummed lately, nto having them to talk to. And I started thinking, "What a baby I'm being! I'm acting like a little kid who doesn't want her mommy to leave her at day care." And I don't understand that... because I was never that kid! Ever notice that the older we get the cooler our parents seem?? I miss my mommy. :-(

P.S. Today is their actual anniversary! What a way to celebrate!

video killed the radio star... and me too

2007-06-08T17:02:00.000-07:00

Well I told you I would do it and I did.... I messed up the barbri video. It was awful. I got there and checked the room that the live feed was going into and everything was set to go in there. I went into the moot court room and we had been locked out of the video tech room. Finally found a key and got in there. I put the tape in... went through all the steps so that it would play on the main screen in the moot court room AND stream into the live feed room. The other room was fine. The moot court room was showing the video... but there was no sound. I re-checked all the instructions and couldn't figure out what was going on. by that time I had everyone who thought they knew something about AV stuff storming the video room. On one hand I was grateful for their help, but on the other hand I didn't want them all messing with the dials and buttons on this huge machine that I had been put in charge of. We finally found our school tech and he got everything fixed after a while... but not before I got to listen to all the bitching. Why don't people understand "technical difficulty?" They don't happen because people aren't trying hard enough, or they're unprepared... sometimes they just happen!! And yelling at someone isn't going to get it fixed any faster. Grrrrr.

Not much else new as far as studying goes. Yoiu'd think a 3.5 hour course wouldn't leave you totally drained everyday... but it does. Or at least, it does for me. A few of the days I've stuck around school till 4 or 5 and continued to study. But most days I just have to get out of there. I've worked from home some.. running multistate questions mostly. I have yet to do any of the essay questions... which I know will probably help me the most. Honestly, I'm really having a hard time getting motivated at all... which is only stressing me out more. I'm just so tired all the time. Oh well... I'll have to find a ways to snap out of that soon. If I take too much longer I'll be pretty behind on the essay topics. If I get on it this weekend though I should be back in good shape.

Tomorrow's gonna suck though. It's Saturday, so I wanna play!! Plus Scott and the boys are going to the gun show and I'd like to go. But class is gonna run extra long... 9-4!! YUCK!! But after that I may go toa movie... i LOVE going to the movies... always have, I always get excited about them.

I'm starting to get more into red wine. I used to really hate and only liked white wine, but I've tried to switch over some in the last month or so. Red has a lot less sugar, plus I should probably get into a habit of having a glass every night because it's so good for your heart. My mom has had a glass of red wine as long as I can remember. And for all the stress she's under, her heart's doing fine. Any particular bottles you all would reccommend? I'm also trying to find a selection of GOOD wine for $10 or less per bottle. Been somewhat successful on that too. My friend Sarah told me about La Vielle Ferme (has a chicken on the label)... it's really good and ony like $7. I've also really like Big House Red, and Menage Trois. Those last two are blends... which I tend to like a little better.

Life's a-changin'

2007-06-03T21:36:00.000-07:00

Been a long time since my Easter post and a lot has happened since then!!

A week or so after easter, Jennifer called to tell me she was engaged! I knew Sam was planning it and stayed up late that night because I knew she'd be calling. The pictures from how he set up their house are amazing. He had flowers everywhere!! Roses and lillies all over the place. I know she was extatic, and you can tell he was too from our conversations. Oh, and the ring is gorgeous! He did a great job.

The rest of the semester rocked along pretty nicely. I tried to keep on top of classes and work and kept playing every Thursday on our softball team. We had our semesterly Kegs for a Kause party and blew away anything we'd ever done before. This time we were able to get a venue downtown, a band, 2 kegs donated, and instead of our usual $400, we made $1215!!! All the money went to the Enterprise Tornado Relief fund..... so we all felt really good about being able to raise that much.

Before I knew it finals were here. And with finals came some scary events. While studying for Crim Pro I got a call from Mom saying that Dad was having chest pains and that Lindsey had gone to pick him up and take him to the hospital. Mom was out of town, and was speeding back trying to make it there as well. They checked him out and kept him over the weekend. They didn't think he had had a heart attack, but they diodn't like the results of some of his tests and wanted to go in and do a heart cath the following Monday, with the possibility of putitng in a stint. Needless to say, by this point I was FREAKING out. I was trying to stay calm, because in my head I knew that caths were pretty routine, i mean i've had a ton of them... but even when you know something like that in your mind, you really can't stop the rest of you from worrying... especially when it's your Dad. So I went home Saturday and stayed the weekend with them and stayed for the cath too. I had a final that Monday, but my prof and the dean let me move it which was really nice of them. Good thing too, because I wasn't able to concentrate or study even a little bit.

Dad's cath came out fine though. They didn't even have to put a stint in, which was great. But they yeled at him pretty good about his diet and excerise, and how his diabetes plays into the health of his heart. He had heard all of this before of course, but I think he was listening a little harder this time... or at least I hope so.

Finals were pretty stressful, especially since I had to squeeze everything into a lot tighter amount of time, having pushed back my first final to go be with Dad. But it worked out okay. I had crim pro, arbitration, law and literature, and TAX!! As you can guess I was most terrified of tax. There was soooo much to learn, and I just couldn't wrap my head around it. I had heard of a lot of peolpe who had made Ds... and quite frankly was praying for a D. I had totally convinced myself that I would get an F, and not be eligible for graduation. I did much better than I expected though (THANKS JD!!) and it ended uop being my second highest grade! In fact, this semester, I had my highest GPA since I started law school!

The Saturday after my tax exam was graduationa nd I was running around crazy tryign to get ready for it. My parents wanted to throw me a party, and we invited TONS of people over to the house for Barbeque and Beer. Scott and I (okay, mostly Scott) did a bunch of work on both the yards, mowing, weeding, planting flowers, etc. We got a keg, ordered a million balloons, lit up the deck, and had a great time! And I got beer steins ordered and printed with "Here's to Us! Cumberland Class of 2007." There ended up being about 50 or so people here. Mike even pulled out his guitar and sang a bunch of his stuff for us, including his "Why don't we get drunnk and sue?" song... big hit.

The day after the party was graduation. Again...crazy. Mark and Lindsey were staying at my house witht me. Mom and Dad met us over here in the morning and then we drove to meet Grandma, Aunt Pam, and Paige, who had all driven up the afternoon before and had gotten here in time for the party, at the brunch that the school had set up for us. we ran from brunch over to campusfor the graduation ceremony. It was actualy a pretty cool ceremony. EAch graduate walks acrosee the stage, gets her diploma, and then turns and faces the audience to "get hooded." Some of our profs draped us in our "hood" which is basically this huge collar thingy that goes over your graduation robe. Every doctorate program gets a different color (law is purple) so it's kind of neat when you see people go through a ceremony who have a few different colors on... THOSE people have done some schooling!!

Anyway, Paige, Aunt Pam, and Grandma went home after the ceremony and we met Beth Anne and Kevin, and some my other cousins out for a nice dinner. and then called it a night. But GUESS what Mom and Dad got me for my graduation present.... JUST GUESS!!! A Franchi shotgun!!! I was/am soooo excited!! It's a type of Benelli (italian gun maker) and it is GORGEOUS!! The wood grain is just amazing and there's engraved designs all over the metal parts of the gun. I just love it!! This is the first gun I've owned. I've always just used Dad's when we've gone hunting or skeet shooting. I'm excited to own my own, and also excited about the idea of passing it down to one of my children.

Well, graduation was a little bitter-sweet because even though I was really proud to have accomplished that... once it was over there is only one thing left to think about... the bar exam. YUCK!! I graduated Saturday, rested on Sunday and then that very next Monday I was back in classes... what the hell?!?! MY PMBR course started then and we had to be there at 9am. We'd test from 9-11, and then from 12-3:30 we go over all the questions and listne toa lecture. It was horrible... and exhausting. And what's worse... SIX days a week... yep, saturdays too.

That weekend Jennifer got married!! They had a small private ceremony and are saving the big wedding for later. I know, you're thinking "Weren't they just engaged like a few paragraphs ago??" They were ready though. I think that's what happens when you live together, it really accelerates your relationship,a nd you're ready for things a lot quicker. Plus, with Sam having just rejoined the Army and most likely deploying soon, it made alot of sense not to have to wait until he got back. It will make things so much easier on them this way, both financially and emotionally. AND the rest of us don't miss out because when he gets back they'll have the big wedding!! :-) It's still very weird to me to think of her as married... I know I'm at the age when everyone is getting married and having kids, but it just doesn't sink in I guess. It's just so surreal.

After completing the PMBR course I started Bar-Bri this week. It's the bigger of the two courses and lasts 6 weeks as opposed to 6 days. You meet at 9 and review with a lecture until about 12:30 or 1. After lunch you're expected to run multistate questions and practice essays, listen to CDs, watch videos, read more outlines, basically anything you can squeeze into your day before crashing and meeting the next day at 9. And again... class on Saturdays, ICK! I've been trying to keep up as well as I can, I've been running multistatequestions, listening to the lecture Cds, and reviewing the lecture outlines. I haven't gotten to any of the essays yet though, which technically already puts me behind. I'm not sure how long I can keep up this pace, but I guess I don't really have a choice in the matter. The worst part is that i'm SOOOO tired. No matter what I do I cna't get enough sleep. I just stay tired all the time. I think it's probably just because the day is so mentally draining, or at least that's what I keep telling myself. I've been trying to go to the gyma little mroe so maybe I'll get some extra energy from that.

Oh well, I guess that's it for now. Gotta get up early because I'm supposed to run the video feed tomorrow for out Evidence lecture. HA! Whoever put ME in charge of the technology has severly underestimated my ability to break anything electrical. If you hear of a black out in Birmingham tomorrow, just know I didn't mean to!!

Easter Update

2007-06-03T21:34:00.000-07:00

Monday, April 9, 2007

Victory is mine!!! AGAIN!!! That's right folks, I won the egg hunt for the second year in a row. Paige said that next year I need to make tshirts that say "Threepeat"... I totally agree.

The trip was home was nice but quick. I've been swamped lately it seems! Last week I had two papers due plus research for baldwin county, this week I have two more. UGH!! What's killing me is that I don't have the time I need to focus on all the school/work stuff I have going on right now. I can't remember the last time i had a weekend here to just get thigns done.

I went on spring break which was AMAZING. I couldn't have had a better time. Had a blast hanging out with my mom and then dad came down and we all went fishing and looking for houses in the area. They both went home and Scott joined me n the condo. I got to see Paige and Elizabeth for a girls karaoke night (plus scott, haha poor boy). Then Scott and I just had a fabulous few days just spending tme alone together. We walked on the beach EVERY NIGHT, went fishing off the rocks, caught a nice dinner, and just enjoyed each other's company.

The weekend after I got back I headed up to Virginia with the newly-formed Cumberland Softball Team!!! I have to admit, I am soooo proud of my team. The school has never had a softball team befor, but my friend Cameron and I heard that this law school softball tournament was a really big deal. Cameron took off running with the idea, and before I knew it we had fielded a men's and a coed team!! We're play in a local league here in town, where we've pretty much been getting clobbered. BUT when we went up to Virginia we kicked a little ass!!! The team that beat us in the coed portion ended up taking the whole tournament.... I had a great time.

So anyway, that was last weekend, then this weekend I was at home for Easter. So it just seems like my life is a whirl wnd right now. But that's okay, we all know that I'm not happy unless I have tons on my plate.

P.S. I'm having an affair... that's right, I'm having a love affair with Cinnamon Toast Crunch cereal. When did that stuff get so good??? SCott bought a box to keep at my house for when he's over here......, umm, yeah, it's gone. Whoops!

Thanks for the Prayers... They Worked!!

2007-06-03T21:30:00.000-07:00

January 3, 2007

I'm writing from our hotel in Minnesota, and I won't get into all of the details... but i just wanted to let you all know that we got an EXCELLENT report this morning. As most of you know, Scott, my parents, and I flew up to the Mayo Clinic to get a second opinion on the distubing news that i received over Thanksgiving break. WE were excited to hear that the doctors at Mayo seem to think that a natural pregnancy is a perfectly viable possibility for SCott and I. Basically, it would require A LOT of extra monitoring during the pregnancy, but that it was feasible. I'll post something more detailed later, for now i am EXHAUSTED, but I just wanted to give you alla quick update. Thank you so much for your prayers.... they CERTAINLY did the trick. It may seem weird, but I never really gave up hope that God a child in our future... we're still learning more about the specifics on how god will send us this child, but I know that through Him everything is possible. Scott and I are so very lucky to have such wonderful friends that care about us. I love you all and will write more later.

Athens - it gets in your blood and you are never the same

2006-12-18T14:50:00.000-08:00

Right now I am sitting atop the “Classic City.” I have spent the day in the most wonderful place on earth… Athens, Georgia. I had some more research to do on a paper, but I came home on Saturday, so I couldn’t go to Cumberland’s library. I decided to ride to work with my Dad, who works in Athens now, and go use UGA’s law library. Haha… so what if I didn’t actually make it to the library until 2pm?

It’s 5pm now though, and the library closed, and I am waiting for my Dad to finish up his work. So I decided that before heading back to his bank where I would just twiddle my thumbs waiting on him, that I should stop in at one of my favorite undergraduate study spot: Starbucks in downtown Athens. While there is perhaps some better local culture to be had at some of the other non-chain shops around town, this Starbucks became on of my favorites because it has a study room upstairs that looks over the main intersection downtown. You can see the beginning of College Ave, all down Broad St., a nice portion of North Campus… AND… The Arch. It’s a great little spot.

So I’m sitting up here, and I started thinking about all the other times I spent “sitting up here.” Usually I was up here under the pretenses of getting something accomplished.. whether it was studying, writing a paper, filling out endless DG paperwork… I always seemed to spend a good portion of my time here just staring out the window. I would lok out over the city and the campus and eventually my thoughts would always turn to the future. I’ve talked before about how when you’re in college it seems like your whole present is really just a preparation for your future. Sometimes along the line you realize how much fun you’re having, and you appreciate those lazy afternoons, crazy nights, and weekends that seem to last forever. But all the while… you know that everything you accomplish here is to get you ready for what is next. And so I often found myself asking, “What IS next?”

And now that I’m back at this Starbucks, looking out over the same campus, and the same city, and watching the same sunset… did I do it? Did I get to “next?” So far, things are right on course. While my “next” and “someday” ideas have changed their shape a bit… I can honestly look back on the goals I’ve had and feel a sense of accomplishment… and that’s a nice feeling. I can breathe a sigh of relief. The sun is setting in Athens, Georgia… and it is beautiful.

Prayer Request

2006-11-27T21:15:00.000-08:00

I feel kinda weird about putting this on here like an all-points bulletin or something… but I really wanted to reach as many of you as possible... looking for all the prayers we can get.

I got some bad news on Wednesday, and while I’m dealing with it a lot better now than I was then… I was hoping those of you who read this might take a moment to pray for Scott and I.

Wednesday I went to the cardiologist. Believe it or not this was the first time I had gone to the adult cardiologist. Yes, that’s right, I’m 25 and I still see the pediatrician. Laugh if you want, but you know you’re jealous of my stickers and lollipops!! Anyway, so at first what my Mom and I were hearing was all really great. Everything looks wonderful, my piggy valve is doing excellent, the pressures look great… all is well in heart-town. But then the doctor starts talking to me about pregnancy. I had always figured that I’d have to do extra stuff during my pregnancy… like a few extra sonograms, probably have a C-section to reduce the stress on my heart… but it turns out I’ve been advised not to get pregnant at all. Yeah… I know… I’m pretty upset.

Apparently there is a certain hormone that is released during/after (not sure which) pregnancy and for women with my condition, it really messes up your heart and lungs. So much so, that if I were to have a child they’re pretty sure I would have to have my heart and my lungs totally replaced otherwise the state that this hormone would leave me in would be terminal. Not only that… they’ve found a specific gene that’s present in some people with my condition. If, I have this gene then there’s a 40% chance that I would pass on some form of heart disease to my child. If this is the case, then not only can I not carry my own child, Scott and I wouldn’t even be able to use our own genetic material to do invitro or anything like that. The only good news here is that the doctor said that if the gene is present then the person normally has certain facial features, which he says I don’t have… so hopefully I don’t have this gene. They took some blood and are doing some genetic testing on it… we should hear about that soon.

So naturally, Scott and I have been pretty upset about all this. I mean, yeah, we’re not married yet, and kids were still a long way of… but they were certainly in the picture. I mean we already have names picked out for crying out loud! There are still a lot of unanswered questions, and I think my family and Scott and I are going to make a trip back up to the Mayo Clinic to get some clarification.

So please pray for us. Please pray for a little extra strength and a little extra faith be sent our way. Pray that there’s a doctor out there somewhere working on a solution to this problem as we speak. And pray for Scott… he’s been excellent through all of this, but I worry about him because I know he’s trying to be strong for both of us, and it’s hard enough to be strong enough for yourself, let alone another person.

I know that God’s will is at work here, and I know in my heart that whatever He decides will be what’s best for Scott and I. But part of me (a BIG part) just REALLY hopes that what God has in mind is what I had in mind too L If it’s not though… we’ll deal with that, and I know it’ll be what’s right for us.

I'm not sick, but i'm not well....

2006-11-09T08:47:00.000-08:00

Okay there is something wrong with me…

Yesterday I sent out an email letting all my friends know that for the next few weeks Winn-Dixie will be handing out coupons to get $10 off every $50 you spend there. I ended it with a P.S. about the Sara Lee turkey that was buy-one-get-one free at the deli.

I’ve been thinking about what I want for Christmas (at my mom’s request) and what have I come up with? A really nice, really big, food processor and an immersion blender.

What is wrong with me?!?! I am 25 years old… TWENTY FIVE!!!! These are not the thoughts of a typical gal my age. Am I turning into Martha Stewart? I hope not… I would prefer Rachel Ray if I had to turn into a modern day cooking show hostess. And why the hell do I know what cooking show hostess I would like to emulate?!?

I do believe I am highly disturbed.

Happy Selfish Day!!!

2006-10-18T06:47:00.000-07:00

Happy Selfish Day!!!

Two weekends ago I visited my cousin, Paige, and her family in Destin. What an awesome visit!! For a little background, Paige has a 2 and a half year old girl, Maggie, and a 2 month old boy, Maddox. She’s lucky enough to have a husband that’s able to be home a lot from work (he’s a youth minister) to help out… but it wasn’t until I got there on Friday that I realized why Paige was so excited. It had been forever since she had had a day all to herself, and it CERTAINLY hadn’t happened since Maddox was born.

So that’s exactly what we did… had the day all to ourselves. We got up around 9 on Saturday, Paige made biscuits and gravy for everyone, and then we ran to Target because my dumb butt had forgotten her swim suit. We ran home to change, pack a beach bag, and were out the door by 11:30. And what did we do once we got there

ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!!! And it was fabulous!!!

The beach is literally a half a mile from Paige’s house (yes, in fact I DO hate her for this), we spread out our towels and just laid there for hours. We’d get up every once in a while to go cool off in the ocean… which by the way… holy crap!! I had never actually been to Destin and had no idea how gorgeous the water is! It was so clear and blue! Not like the Gulf (which I still love), where there’s a lot of seaweed, and the water’s a little murky and hard to see through to the bottom. I hadn’t seen water that looked like this since I went on my cruise to the Caribbean.

Yeah, so we laid around doing a lot of nothing till around 1:30 when we decided to eat. We walked up the beach to the Cran Trap restaurant where we had a meal that was HORRIBLE for us… but oooooooohhhh so good. I will not tell you what all we had to eat because we both agreed that if we don’t talk about it, then we didn’t really eat it all. I will tell you about the yummy drink I had: the crab trap rum punch… mmmmmm. I didn’t necessarily want a drink but Paige decided that since we were letting our hair down, but she was still breast feeding, and a minister’s wife to boot, she would “vicariously party” through me :-) So I was ordered to get something to drink… I have to admit, she didn’t exactly have to twist my arm. It was yummy, and we proceeded back down the beach for more laying around. We gave ourselves a mini-pedi complete with a baby oil and sand exfoliation, we played in the ocean some more, looked at the fish biting our toes, and talked forever. What a great afternoon!

The rest of the weekend went pretty quickly. I had promised to show Paige how to cook vegetable couscous. And much to Josh’s surprise, he actually liked it!! We caught a movie that night, and then on Sunday we all went to church. I left after church and had a lovely drive home, taking back roads that I hadn’t taken on the way down. It was a great weekend, and even though the stressed consumed me again as soon as I walked through my front door, it was just so nice to have such a random and fabulous mini-vacation. :-) :-) :-)

lessons of the sick

2006-10-16T19:58:00.000-07:00

I've been sick for a while and I finally went to the doctor today. As a result I've been extra pitful and have required even more comforting than usual. Also, I decided I need to treat myself, and in the process learned two things:

1. I went to starbucks in search of tea to soothe my throat, but when I got there I decided what I really wanted was their new maple machiatto. The girl behind the counter persuaded me not to get it though because apparently dairy is the last thing you wna tot put on your throat when it's sore. So she advised that I get the caramel apple cider instead. Lesson #1: the caramel apple cider from starbucks rocks!!

2. I've been craving ice cream for a bout a week now. Specifically, I've been craving pumpkin ice cream from brusters that only comes out in the fall. So I decided to screw the ban on dairy and give in! I deserve it, I had to get a shot today!! Lesson # 2: Bruster's Pumpkin Ice Cream rocks just as much as i remember from last year!!

P.S. I realize I have not yet blogged about my travels to Destin OR to Alaska. I promise they are coming soon. I have the destin one almost written, i just keep getting interrupted. Hmm, perhaps if I stopped runnign all over the place buying cider and ice cream i'd have more time for blogging.

I'm an Idiot

2006-10-03T06:30:00.000-07:00

Okay... so I thought maybe I had grown out of this stage in my life where I say things, not realizing the terrible innuendo i've just uttered... but I guess not. Haven't grown out of my idiocy. If we're not prepared to brief the case in my Labor Law classour professor gives us the option of answering an Andy Griffith question instead. Yesterday I was called on for the last case, and of course I was unprepared. Luckily I had the law review outline pulled up on my computer screen so I started trying to read the summary for the case. But the more I read, the less sense it made to me, and I guess I just freaked out. And then the follwing conversation took place...

ME: (senseless babble about the case from the outline)... Ummmm, I think I should probably just go ahead and take the Andy Griffith question.

(laughter from class)

PROF: Are you sure? You were dong so good!

ME: Yeah, well I was faking it.

PROF: You were what?

ME: I was faking it.

PROF: (stare at me with blank eyes and a little grin) Wow, there's so many things I could do with that, but I'm just gonna bite my tongue.

(More laughter... much more)

Yeah, so I guess some things never change. Grrrrr.

It's Official... I wouldn't make it in the ARMY

2006-09-26T09:42:00.000-07:00

The Asthmatic and the Heart Patient Get Fit: Chapter One

Okay, so Jada and I have been trying to work out more. We’ve been hiking a couple times (3-4 hours each), we’ve gone canoeing, and we’ve been going to the gym more. The few couple of weeks we were hitting the gym 3-4 times a week, but the last two weeks we’ve only been 1 or 2 times. So… point being, we started off strong but we’ve been slacking a little bit

So last week I see this poster at the gym for BOOTCAMP! 4 weeks of intense boot camp-style training. Sprints, jumping jacks, squats, lunges, stairs, push ups… the works. We meet Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays @ 5:30 am.

Today was the first day. I hurt.

Here’s a run down of how class went this morning. I picked Jada up and we split a red bull to get that extra boost of energy we knew we would need. We get there and head out to the b-ball court behind the gym with our new classmates. Ummm.. yeah, so the first words out of our instructor’s mouth is that we all might want to start taking some TUMS before class starts. He said it would help with the nauseous felling that we’ll be getting in class from all the stopping and starting. And he was right… I DID feel nauseous!! I’ve never felt like that before when I’ve worked out! He said something about all the stopping and starting creating a lactic acid build-up in our bodies and that’s why we all felt nauseous.

Yeah, so this workout was AWFUL!! I still feel sick to my stomach, and may very well fall over dead at any moment. About 15 mins into it I think Jada started to worry about how the ‘ole piggy heart was doing…

Jada: You okay

Me: (Gasp) Yeah (Gasp)

Jada: Are you sure?

Me: (wheeze) Have I turned red? (wheeze)

Jada: No

Me: Then I’m fine. If I turn red and I still tell you I’m fine, then you’ll know I’m lying

At one point during the suicide sprints, I REALY busted it out. I wanted to beat the little fit girl next to me so I ran as fast as I could… almost falling down (I fall down a lot). Yeah, but I won! I was very pleased with myself until I heard the little fit girl say to her friend, “Oh, were we not supposed to stop at that second line? I stopped there. Whoops” Great! So she even stopped when she wasn’t supposed to and I STILL just barely beat her.

About halfway through, while we’re mid-lunge… Jada turns to me and says, “Skip your 8am and come with me to Cracker Barrel. After this I deserve a pancake!”

The end of the class is coming so we all start to run off the court. Yes! It’s finally over! But wait… they’re not going into the gym! Jada says, “No! they’re going the wrong way!” We weren’t headed back inside… instead we were running toward the stairs to do these double stair lunge climb thingies L Yes, they sucked a lot!

As we’re running, I tell Jada I feel sick. She says, “Try not to throw up. If you do have to throw up, do it in the woods. That’s my advice.” Jada… full of wisdom that girl.

When we FINALLY came back inside and were all writing down our email addys for the trainer (or Satan, as I like to call him), he asked me how I felt. I’m sure he was expecting something like “I feel good coach!” or “ It wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be” Instead he got…

…. “ I wanna hurl.”

What then?

2006-09-22T21:54:00.000-07:00

What do you do when you have a problem that you can't take to the person you always take your problems to? The one person that can always make you laugh, who put things in perspective, and make you understand why everything's going to be okay? What then?

I feel so alone.

Status: Alum... and that's okay

2006-09-14T19:17:00.000-07:00

I’ve been meaning to blog this for a while, but due to my recent inability to access the internet from my laptop (ahem… how’s that coming scott?) I’ve had limited opportunities to sit down in front of a computer for that long a period of time.

Two weeks ago I attended the opening day for Alabama football! My parents had gotten us all tickets and we all went over to T-Town, stayed with my parents’ close college friends, tailgated ALL DAY on Saturday, and just generally had a great time. About an hour or two before kickoff we were tailgating around the corner from the stadium, and I was sitting in a chair, just kind of taking it all in.

I started thinking about how I’ve felt since I graduated from college. I’ve been sort of in this state of limbo. Yes, I’m technically an alum, but since I’m still in school I don’t really feel like an alum because I’m not in the “real world” yet. And though I’m not in the work force or anything, law school is obviously nothing like college. I have to say, I had a not-so-great time in high school, an AMAZING college experience, and law school has almost been like a chance for a do-over for my high school experience. For those of you not in school with me, the similarities between law school and high school are ridiculous!! We have lockers, gossip floats around as free-flowing as the air, and the “seniors” make fun of the “freshmen”; acting like we know SO much more than those even one year behind us.

Any-who… I’ve been a little depressed about my “alum” status. While law school has been great, and I’ve made amazing friends, I often stop and say, “Damn… I really miss Athens. I really miss the DG house. I really miss the UGA in-zone with the subtle hint of Jim Beam in the air. I really miss getting in the car, heading downtown, wondering what kind of adventures lay ahead for that night. I miss stopping, looking around at all my sisters, feeling love that only makes others grin at what they think is a cliché.”

So I’ve been a little sad lately about just how rare I’m able to see my college friends. I also think that I’ve realized just how close the “real world” is and how much I miss that time when the real world still seemed like a far off dream… when you still referred to it as “someday.”

And I was sitting there, looking at my parents, their friends, their friends’ friends… and suddenly it hit me: Look how much fun they’re having! Maybe I don’t need to be scared of the “real world.” Haha, because from what I can see, Mom and Dad are both schnuckered, all their friends are schunckered, and they have that look in their eye like they too are wondering about the adventures that lay ahead for that night. And what’s more… even though they’re no longer in those “adventurous years” it seems as if they’ve had so many adventures since that time… and those are the kind of adventures that I can look forward to as well.

So I’m going to try to embrace my alum status a little more. And realize that just because I’m not a college girl anymore doesn’t mean I’m dead! That being said… GO DAWGS!!!

best weekend EVER (or at least in a long time)

2006-08-21T18:04:00.000-07:00

So I’m officially lapped. Yep, my YOUNGER sister got married last weekend. I have to say, in spite of all the stress this wedding has brought in the past year, I really had a GREAT time.

Don’t get me wrong, Lindsey was her usual self, which means she dealt out her usual dose of rude, albeit unintentional comments (or at least I keep telling myself they’re unintentional), to me. Lindsey was majorly stressed out about the whole concept so I guess I have to cut her a little slack, but yeah... there was definitely a scene reminiscent of “Sixteen Candles.” Remember when Samantha comes running back out of the church to see her sister off, but the sister’s already left and didn’t really care to say good bye to her? Same basic scenario... I stayed behind at the reception cleaning up with my family, while everybody else went back to the hotel. Lindsey called frantically, looking for her bridesmaids, who were on their way back to the hotel as well. When I tell her that they should be there soon, she says “Oh good, because I wanted to take a few more pictures... see ya Mandy!” CLICK. Yeah, so pictures were taken without the maid of honor... which upset me, but I guess I couldn’t get too upset... it’s typical.

Judging from the last paragraph, you’re probably thinking, “Okay, where’s the GREAT part of the weekend come in?” Pretty much everything else about the wedding/reception/after party/weekend absolutely rocked. Tons of my extended family and close family friends had driven up for this shin dig. We’re talking all the Mobile crew, families we grew up with and went to church with, our old next door neighbors (who’s son I used to baby sit and is now a good 2 ft taller than me), my parents’ best friends from college (the ones who named their daughter after my mom), plus Jill and Scott were both there. Yeah, so I’d say there plenty of people to party with... and party we did!!! In fact, at one point my Great Aunt Agnes was even on the dance floor dancing to “Funky Cold Medina (sp?)”

Oh... and the following conversation took place:

(DJ starts playing “Play That Funky Music White Boy”)

Me: Hey Dad, they’re playing your song!

Dad: Oh yeah, I’m a FUNKY... WHITE... BOY!! (emphasizing each word with a gyration...oh yes he did!)

It was a great little mini-vacation, and who knows when we’ll get all those people together again. At one point Scott leaned over and said, “We’ve GOT to have an after-party like this with your family at our wedding... because my family’s not nearly this much fun!!!” And you know, he’s right. Not that his family isn’t fun, because they are... but I’m really lucky to have a family that I actually ENJOY spending time with. I forget that not everyone is as fortunate, and I have truly been blessed. They say, “You can choose your friends, but you can’t choose your family.” But I think if I Could choose my family, I would make it exactly how it already is. Hmmm perhaps minus the scenes from “Sixteen Candles.”

"And All Around My Memory... You Dance"

2006-07-24T05:57:00.000-07:00

Do you remember your first love? What about that summer love? I've always been told that these were powerful experiences, but in the past I just shirked that line of thought as being something out of a story book. How can someone mean so much to you just because of where they fell in your sequence of relationships? And perhaps even more illogical, how can someone mean so much to you just because of the time of year in which you met/dated? Can you imagine if both of these experiences were packaged into one incredible person? How powerful! How is it that some people can grab ahold of our heart in such a way that we never really allow them to let go? Or rather, WE never fully let go of THEM.

Is it because the way in which they've captured this status of "first love" or "summer love" has placed them on a pedastool that no matter what they do, they can never fall from? And you romanticize them until they're this super-human romantic force. And how do these "first loves" and "summer loves" fit into the romantic images we have as children? What happens when this person can hold this powerful spot in your heart and on top of all that be everything you THOUGHT you always wanted... the kind of "perfect boyfriend," Prince Charming, take-home-to-daddy, man that you always imagined while you sat in front of your TV watching movies and wondering what YOUR Tom Hanks in "Sleepless in Seattle" would look like.

How has your definition of "the one" changed? Did your first love or your summer love fit that definition at one time? Do they fit it now? More importantly... how do you know FOR SURE that your definition has changed and you just happen to find someone who meets the new criteria.... OR... is it that you've met someone new, and your definition changed after you met them?

The Great American Lunch Time Vote

2006-07-19T11:57:00.000-07:00

Okay kids... this time last year I posted a voting system on here to help me decide which breed of dog to get. As you know, I now have a german short-haired pointer and LOVE her... so we're going to try the blog voting system again. you should know how this works... leave a comment to "Vote."

I've been telling the carpool that I will one day bring in either lunch or some kind of baked good, but haven't decided what to bring. Your issue? What should Amanda bring for the dining pleasure of her fellow AG clerks? Below are some choices. Now remember, yur vote also counts as your RSVP, saying that you want to eat some. You don't have to actually be in the office to vote, BUT if you are in the office and DON'T vote, then I'm not counting you in my calculations for how much food to provide. With that said... here are your choices:

1. chicken and rice
2. jumbalaya
3. pumpkin soup
4. field peas and corn bread
5. homemade mac-n-cheese
6. vegetable couscous
7. peach cobbler
8. last year's ice cream cake

NOTE: i realize that some of these could be combined, so if a good combination comes in 1st and 2nd place i'll consider a combo

Up For Parole

2006-07-11T10:41:00.000-07:00

This morning my fellow clerks and I observed two hearings before the AL Parole Board. Both were murder cases, and neither were paroled... but the whole process got me thinking (damgerous i know). While many states have what is apparently called "mandatory release" (meaning that whatever sentence you get is the one you serve), AL has "conditional release" (meaning that you can be paroled). I guess I'm a little conflicted now as to which system is better.

Now I know what you're thinking... at first glance the mandatory release looks like the obvious choice. Those criminals should serve every day of their sentence! And for the most part I agree. The only thing that has me on the fence is the incentive that the parole system generates for criminals to try to rehabilitate themselves. Now I'm not talking about rehabilitation in the way that every criminal seems to get comfy with God and "have a change of heart." I'm more concerned with the education that they now have an opportunity (or maybe they just do out of boredom at this point) to receive. And yeah, while I doubt that getting your GED really makes you not want to go steal another car, isn't it better than nothing at all? If they knew they were going to have to serve 10 years no matter what, then why would anyone bother to try to better themselves? And what happens when he serves his 10 years, but has done nothing to educate himself, learn to cope with anger, or dealt with his drug addiction?

I guess it boils down to whether it's better to keep them out of society for a longer period of time, or whether it's better to roll the dice if it means there's a greater chance that they might not do it again. VERY tough question, and I'm not going to pretend to know the answer... but I'd like to know what all of YOU think.

DRAMA! DRAMA! DRAMA!

2006-07-10T10:29:00.000-07:00

What a wild ride this weekend was! It seemed like there was drama everywhere I turned! In my life, as well as three of my closest friends. And in examining all of these scenarios, what seemed to be the root of the problem?? MEN! Grrr...

Well, I guess to be more accurate, it wasn't necessarily the men at fault... but this weekend (at least for us four) centered around romantic relationships and how far we're willing to go to protect them. How long are we willing to play the knight in shining armor in order to protect what we have with our own knights in shining armor?

It's amazing to me the number of fronts on which a relationship can be attacked. Sometimes your attacker is a person... an outsider... and whether they mean to or not, they pose a huge threat to the relationship you hold so dear. And even when there isn't an actual threat, should you jump into action even at the notion that this incident COULD have posed a threat? It's so hard to walk the thin line of protecting something you treasure while still maintaining your composure and civility when all you really want to do is start screaming, cursing, and throwing things. While you always try to act with class... who ever heard of a classy knight?

And sometimes this attacker is someone dear to you... like a parent. How can one be certain, especially if the relationship is brand new, that this new beau is worth alienating those that are close to you? Are you really ready to protect a relationship that's still in its infancy at the expense of severing ties with those who raised you, support you, and have loved you for so long despite all your faults? AND are you really ready for the affect that your decision will have on others who have to watch you sever those ties? Howmany people are you willing to sacrifice for this new relationship?

Perhaps even scarier is when this attacker is your very own knight in shining armor! With weapons like non-communication, refusal to put effort into the relationship, and a lack of empathy, the one you love can be the very person attacking your love. How do you let this person know that whle you love them more than anything, you will stop at nothing to disarm their attack... especially when they don't understand or are perhaps totally unaware of the weapons they are using??

And what about romance that has already come and gone? How long do you protect the memory of what you once had and the strings on which that relationship (now turned friendship) are hanging? At some point you must decide that you no longer can protect the relationship but instead must only protect yourself. This realization is most difficult. All you can do is look back toward the battlefield, smile at the memories, arm yourself with the lessons you've learned, and live to fight another day. The only diference being, that this time you're fighting for yourself and for knights in shining armor that you have yet to meet.

(SIGH) And so ends the weekend for my three friends and I. But while this weekend's drama may have ended, I highly doubt the battles are over. Some have just begun, some have been going on for months, and some depend on the actions of other to determine if the battle is indeed over. We are all in desperate need of sleep... and since we're doing all this fighting shouldn't we be getting some sort of soldier's commission? Who do I need to contact to see about my check?

Banished to the basement

2006-06-28T14:12:00.000-07:00

Well Jill and I lost our trial competition last weekend. It was kind of bitter-sweet. I was sad to lose, but I was also REALLY relieved to no thave to research/prepare anymore. I was worn out! Besides, I wasn't sure I could top last weekend, since there's really nothing like trying a case commando. ;-)

I'm slowly settling in at the new job. For those of you who don't know, I'm working for Alabama's Attorney General in the Welfare/ Medicaid Fraud division. Sadly it's not turning out to be what I expected. Though I love any kind of gvt work, I have also been drawn to any kind of legal work affecting the medical field. I guess that stems from me firmly believing that all those visits to the hospital were meant to propel me to make a difference. Whether it's working directly with the Heart Association, defending doctors, lobbying... I'm really not sure yet. But ehre's the point... When I saw that the AG had a division dealing with Medicaid Fraud I thought, "Hey, here's an opportunity for me to help punish those who are abusing and cheating a system that's meant for those who are really down on their luck... for those who need medical help and have no other way to get it... to punish those who are effectively decreasing the aid that these people who really need it can get." Plus, it was pretty much the closest I was going to come to anything medical while at the AG's office. Along with these thoughts I was told that the Division Chief for this field had cases all over the state, but that a large majority of them are in Birmingham, meaning that I wouldn't have to commute as often to Montgomery (about an hour and 15 minutes each way... UGH!)

Well, here's what's it's turning out to be so far... I'm stuck in the cold basement with a division that's made up of 4 people (only one attorney). This office is pretty much secluded from the rest of the building, underground, nothing on the walls, and just all around YUCKY. The people are nice, but honestly I'm not sure they knew I was coming, so the work so far has been less than enticing. For example, for the first 2-3 days I organized this guy's private files on Ronald Reagan and made copies of the whole thing so that he could send it off the Reagan Library and the Reagan Legacy Project. While the file was interesting, just because I love history, that really wasn't the kind of work I signed up for. Hello?!?! Where's the legal work?? He's given me a couple other assignments, so maybe those will prove to be mroe enjoyable.

And as for the commuting... it doesn't look like this guy is in B'ham as much as I was lead to believe. I fact, I think we're looking at probably just being there on Fridays. NOT GOOD.

AND... even though I was told the welfare fraud and medicaid fraud divisions were all together... I found out today that they're actually separate, and guess which one I'm NOT in. you guessed it... I'm in Welfare, which means I won't be seeing ANY medical stuff which was the entire basis of my original interest. :-(

So anyway, I'm more than frustrated this week. I miss my job at Baldwin County BAD!! I miss spending so much time with my Grandma also. The one good thing has been how much I've been able to see SCott this week. I've really issed him... more than I even realized.

Progress in the Lunchroom

2006-06-14T19:12:00.000-07:00

It didn't take long for me to find my place at the lunch table. Once I got the balls to sit in there for a day or two, I found myself slipping into the conversation more naturally. They really are sweet ladies, I'm glad to be able to relax with them everyday while I eat my daily lean cuisine.

Well, Grandma and I have been just about everywhere since I first rolled into Mobile. The first weekend (Memorial Day weekend) we drove down to Destin to visit my cousin Paige, her husband Josh, and thr daughter Maggie. I hadn't been to destin since I was really small and I couldn't believe that water!! It was nice to actually spend some time at a beach since my whole week at Gulf Shores with my sister and my mom was spent commuting back and forth to work. Maggie learned to say a new phrase... "Manda's a genius!" It kinda sounds more like "Manda's Jesus!" but what're you gonna do?

On Memorial Day my Grandma and I drove "up the country" to visit my Aunt Paula on the farm. We stopped in for a minute to see my Grandma's sister, Aunt Melba, and her husband, Uncle Mason. I hadn't seen them in a long time and we had a nice chat about why rain water was so much better for the crops than irrigated water. Mobile could sure use some rain... it's super dry down here. Then we headed on to Aunt Paula's and spent about 3 or 4 hours visiting with her. I think she's coming along in her grieving process. This time last summer I remember she still wouldn't say Kyle or Uncle Ben's names... but this vist she was talking about them a lot more. It's good to see that she's progressing... slowly progrssing, but progressing nonetheless. About the time we were ready to leave Michael came back from the cow sale. Apparently he had some cattle that were just totally unruly and his hands were starting to refuse to work them. Haha, one day they even got out while he wasn't around and Autn Paula had to chase them all down, and then promptly told Michael, "I am way too old, and way too fat to be chasin' them cows"! So anyway... the cows are history.

It being Memoial Day, Grandma and I stopped by the cemetery. I had brought some flowers for Uncle Ben, Kyle, Grandma and Grandaddy Jordan, Aunt Darlene, and Aunt Lottie. I was sad to discover I was one sunflower short, (I had forgotten Darlene! She passed when she was 4 from polio, so I never knew her) so Grandma and Grandaddy had to share , but I figured they'd rather share and let Darlene have a flower for herself, because I doubt she gets many visitors. And just like the last day I was there, a gentle rain started up and ushered me back to the car. As I left, I hung my feather back up on my rearview mirror. And for those of you who keep up with this blog (guess htat counts you out louise!), you'll agree that this was an appropriate time for its re-hanging.

The next weekend I dorve up to Birmingham for the trial competition. It was really great to see Scott. We hadn't seen each other in about 3 weeks and I had really missed him. As I was leaving to head back to Mobile on Sunday I got some shocking news... Uncle Mason had died. It was so weird... I had JUST seen him less than a week before. Boy was I glad Grandma and I had decided at the last minute to stop by there. Dad came in that Wednesday for the funeral. It was sad, but i guess it's better to go suddenly like that than to have it drug out.

This past weekend I REALLY burned up the highway! I drove to Birmingham on Friday so that I could be there for the trial competition, drove to ATL saturday night so that I could be there Sunday for Lindsey's wedding shower, and then back to Mobile Sunday afternon. Whew!! I was exhausted!!

Looks liek I'm heading back to Birmingham this weekend too. Jill and I advanced in the competition (YAY!!) so we compete Saturday morning again. Plus, Jennifer's coming to visit. Her visit's kind of bitter-sweet. I'm really excited that she's coming, but she's coming to visit becasue she's movnig to Alaska on Tuesday!!!! Her and Sam seem to be going really well though, so I'm happy for htem. I'm kind of jealous... what an adventure!! Heading off to the Arctic Frontier only to be warmed byt he arms of your man!! SWOON!!

Back in the high school lunch room!!!

2006-05-17T10:50:00.000-07:00

Yeah Yeah... so it's been a while since i've updated... i know, i know. I'll give youa quick re-cap and the'll move on to what my mind's swirling around right now.

So Easter was AWESOME!!! i finally won the egg hunt!! Oh yeah, that's right!! and we didnt' even have to go into over time. Three time outs were called (scott has a picture of me on leanign on my knews panting). We finally instuted some "zone hunting" toward the end to speed up the process. But after about an hour and a half i was crowned champion, with a final score of 58-46!! GO ME!! If you'd like a more in depth play-by-play (and you know i have the whole thing catalogued) let me know and i'll give the detailed scoop.

Since then I've finished my 2nd year of law school, celebrated 4 of my friends' birthdays, thrown scott a surprise party where some of his fraternity brothers came in from Athens, MOVED, met my mom and sister down at the beach, and started my new job at the Baldwin County Commissioners' Office, down here in mobile! WHEW!! I've been running around crazy!

Okay, so here's what's bugging me right now: So I'm here in the County Commissioners' Office, and it's lunch time. Now, I have my very own office (weeee!! i know!!), I have the break room down the hall with a fridge and microwave, and then there are a few places around town to go eat. Monday I was running errands during lunch, so since i was already out I stopped in this place for a bowl of gumbo. YUM! Yesterday my mom (who is down here at teh beach this week) packed me a sandwich. Today mom packed all kinds of yummy things from our dinner last night: baked ham, baked beans, and cheesey-potato casserol... mmmmm. Now TODAY my lunch requires microwaving... herein lies my problem.

There are two men in this office. They are the two lawyers. EVERYONE else here is a woman... most of them in their 40s or 50s. Talk about a hen house!! They're all super nice... your typical southern women. I was just in the break room to heat up my lunch, and there were about 4 of them in there... 2 of which i've been working fairly closely with. I'm fixing my plate, and they're chatting away... haha, they were trying to figure out the difference between regular salt and iodized salt.

So my food's done, and got to walk out the door to eat at my desk!! I wanted ot eat with them but i was utterly petrified. What the hell is wrong with me!??!?! I'm a grown-ass woman, why am i scared?!?! And it wasn't even like I wasn't invited... Sandra, my lawyers' secretary (SUPER nice) said "Amanda, don't you wann eat with us?" To which I replied, "Oh no thank you, I'm going to try to get some work done during lunch." What a loser!!!

Now when have any of you ever seen Amanda turn down a chance to TALK!?!?! And I don't think it's that they're so much older than me. That sort of thing has never bothered me before. I mena, I hang out with Jill all the time!! (HAHA, i'm sorry jill, i just couldn't resist) There is absolutely no reason I should be this scared of these women. But I feel like I'm back in the high school lunch room, it's the first day, and I'm a freshman!! I just haven't "broken in" yet.

How do I get over this? I dont' wanna eat at my desk everday!!

Easter's On It's Way

2006-04-14T14:43:00.000-07:00

Countdown to Easter: 2 days!!!

For those of you who are new to this blog, you may not be aware of how seriously my family takes our annual egg hunt. Just to clue you in, here’s the re-cap from last year.

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Pre-Game: MARCH 25, 2005:

I love Easter, mostly because every year my sister and I still have an egg hunt in our front yard. That's right... we hunt eggs, with our 5-year-old neighbors doing the same thinga cross the street. Ain't no shame in our game! My family is HUGE on tradition, and this is one that Lindsey and i just don't want to give up. It's kind of sad though, because she kicks my ass every year!!! I think the last time I won, I was 6 and she was 4... it's been downhill ever since. My poor Dad used to try to hide eggs up high when i was still taller than her, hoping this would give me an edge, but I'd still lose.

We're pretty serious about it. We break out the tennis shoes, and the running pants... a loose fitting shirt, better for swift movements. The most important part, however, is your basket. My mom has a collection of old wicker baskets, and you want to get one that has a really wide mouth, with high walls. This is essential! You don't want a small mouth that you have to take time making sure you get your egg in the basket, and you need high walls, so the eggs don't spill out while you're running.

There was one year in college that I didn't participate. I went to a friend's house in Memphis for Easter. Mom took my place. Apparently it was a close race, mostly because my Mom tripped Lindsey as they were running down the stairs so that she could get the easy ones up front. To this day my Mom still claims Lindsey "tripped." :-)

This is my year baby!! I can feel it. The egg hunt title will be mine! I say this every year, and every year i still lose... but this year is diferent. I can smell victory!

Post Game Re-Cap: MARCH 30, 2005

Well, Easter has come and gone… and so has Spring Break. L I had a good time visiting my family this weekend, but the egg hunt produced another loss. The hunt took place in 2 phases, 145 eggs were hidden, and only minor injuries were sustained this year. There was a bit of a controversy over an egg that was found during phase 2, but it was hidden in phase 1 territory. The egg in question was held in the judge’s pocket (Daddy a.k.a. Head Bunny) until “such time as it becomes needed in a close race.” The egg in question became the deciding factor in whether a tie could take place for the first time in 17 years. Alas, after the excitement of finding two other eggs from previous years’ hunts, along with finding the controversial egg… the results were 74-73, with Lindsey as the winner. Stinks that I lost again, but as Lindsey so cordially put it, “Yeah Mandy, but it would be a shame to break a tradition.”

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So my training has been a little better this year. I’ve been running more. Hopefully there will be a marked difference in my endurance. You’d think egg hunting would be a sprinter’s game… but when my Dad usually hides 100 + eggs (my mom counted 150 for this year’s games) it becomes more of a distance runner’s sport. Yes, there are sprints across the yard involved, but you have to be able to sustain enough energy to continue these sprints for 30 mins – 1 hour. Also, I got some new running shoes a few weeks ago and have been breaking them n on the treadmill. Hopefully the added traction will be helpful as well. ALSO my friend Paul, who’s in the Army, has been trying to show me some of the tactics they use when they’re out “hunting Charlie.” So he’s had me practicing my “swivel-head” all week. My head supposed to continually swivel on my neck, constantly scanning for Charlie… umm, I mean eggs.

We’re going to my grandma’s house in Mobile this year for the hunt. Neutral Ground. As Pittman put it, “So, it’s like a Bowl game!” That’s right, it’s the Ga / Fla of egg hunts this weekend! I hope all of your Easter’s go well. I will keep you posted on the results of the egg hunt. Hopefully we won’t have to show up to church with bruised knees and busted lips ;-)

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In other news, I got a great surprise from Scott the other night. Now, before you start with your “awwww”s… he was trying to get out of the dog house. Monday night we had talked about possibly getting together. He was supposed to come over to my apt and we were gonna watch a movie. Keep in mind I had a REALLY busy week, so I told him Monday was really the only day we could get together, and to get over there early so I could go to bed early. He was supposed to call in the early evening to tell me if the plans were for sure. Well, I never got a call. I was PISSED!! Especially since I stayed up later than I should have because I was thinking he may still be coming. When I finally got him on the phone I let him know just how pissed I was. I got the whole “Sweetie, I’m so sorry, I lost track of time, I swear I’ll make it up to you” speech. I can tell he felt like poo about it, but I highly doubted I’d really get it “made up to me.”

THEN Wednesday evening I had my final trial. This was like my final exam for my Trial Skills class and I had been working my ass off on it. Earlier in the week he said he wanted to come. But on Tuesday night apparently he and Josh had stayed up all night and way into Wednesday morning playing some stupid board game. So by the time I talked to Scott on Wednesday it was only about an hour before the trial, and too late for him to make it probably. So by now I was like, “you DOUBLE suck!!”

Enter my surprise! He showed up at my apt just as I was getting home from the trial with my new favorite ice cream (edy’s grand light, double churned, rich and creamy, French Silk flavor… I was pretty impressed he remembered which one since he’d only seen the carton once, and it’s kind of a long name), AND fresh strawberries, AND the “when harry met sally” DVD that I love, AND roses!! J So yeah, he got out of the dog house pretty quick. Smart boy… he knows that flowers are nice, but if really wants to get out of trouble, ice cream is the way to go with this girl!!

Kool-Aid Head

2006-04-08T14:44:00.000-07:00

Okay, so most of you have figured out by now that the marriage thing was a big April Fools. Most of you figured it out from the get go... but I fooled more of you than i thought i would. So thanks for being good sports. Surprisingly, Scott was not as amused by my joke. I got a "marriage is not something to joke about... it's more meanigful than tha" lecture...blah blah blah. What a party pooper!! Eventualy he came a round and had fun with it though.

Oh my gosh! My hair!! I've been planning for a while to color my hair. sCott and I have been talking about it for probably about a year now, and had decided that some nice subtle auburn highlights would look nice. Well, I decided Tuesday was the big day. It did NOT go well. I told her exactly what a I wanted, that I wanted them subtle, and really nto so "red," and I even brought ina picture! What did I get? These chunky magenta racing stripes!! It seriously looked like the Kool-Aid man had sat on my head. I looked terrible!! And even though Heath said i "looked like a hot punky rock chick," i was NOT pleased!! AND I had an interview for a law firm in Mobile on Wednesday and had to go with my hair looking like that!!

I went back on Thursday to get them to fix it. Jill and Jada went with me to be "my balls," since not having any is what got me into this mess in the first place. It's still not exactly what i was going for to begin wiht, but it's a lot better than it was. And Scott seems to be happy with it. He says it's nice to have something different every now and then.

Next weekend I go down to Mobile with my faily for Easter. I've been training for the annual egg hunt with my sister. I probably should be working on some sprints though. Jill generously offered to "start hiding things" form me so that i can work on spotting things. If you have any training tips let me know.

Countdown till Egg Hunt: 8 days!!!

I'm MARRIED!!!

2006-04-01T10:23:00.000-08:00

Well,I guess my life got a little less boring!! After I got back from Blockbuster last night scott and I got on the phone and started talking... and well.... if you haven't already heard... THIS is what happened

Dear Friends,

I bring you some very exciting news on this Saturday morning. Scott and I are MARRIED!!! I know this seems sudden, but it’s really not that sudden for us. We’ve been dating for four years now, and over the past few months we’ve been discussing our engagement. With both of us still in school (and broke as a joke) marriage seemed so far away. Last night we got to talking again about how far off our dream seemed to be, and we finally decided there was really no point in waiting. Why should we put off what we know will end up happening eventually anyway? We just got a wild hair and decided to drive to Biloxi to get married!! Neither of us had ever been there, and we thought experiencing a new place for the first time… together… would be a perfect way to begin our marriage.
We know this seems sudden, and may come as a surprise to many of you. However, we don’t want you to feel left out of the celebration. We drove back early this morning (unfortunately, I had to be at school by 8:30 this morning to serve as a witness for the Advanced Trial class), and we look forward to planning a big celebration with you all. We hope to have a “Welcome Home” reception and would love for you all to be there to help us celebrate this moment in our lives.

Love,
Mr. and Mrs. Scott Miller

My Life is so LAME!!!

2006-03-31T20:46:00.000-08:00

let's review this evening's events:

For starters... its friday night, and i'm not drunk. I'm not at a party, and i haven't been dancing. nope.... i have to witness for a trial tomorrow morning, so i have to be in bed early. WHICH MEANS... no scott tonight.

We didnt' see each other tonight....so i told myself i would study and clean...but instead i jsut sat around all afternoon and played on the internet. I was completely and totally UNMOTIVATED to do ANYTHING!!! so then, about 9:40 i decide that i'm not gonna get any studying done, and i shuold go lay in my bed and watch a movie and try to go to sleep which means i needed to run to blockbuster for said movie. so i throw on some flip flops with my gym shorts and MASSIVELY baggy t-shirt and head out at this point i realized that i'm not wearing a bra, but i decide i really don't care... i'll be in and out... no biggie

you still with me? i know it's hard to make youself pay attention, because my life is JUST THAT LAME!!!

anyway, so i go to blockbuster, where i rent some 5 yr old sandra bullock movie called "28 days" and the first season of this series from a few years back called "american dreams" or something like that. And ya wanna know why i picked those two? BECAUSE I HAD ALREADY FLIPPIN' SEEN EVERYTHING ELSE IN THE DAD-BURNED BLOCKBUSTER!!!!!!!!! Because go a rent a movie is all i ever do anymore!!! I'm SO lame!!!! to make matter worse... itwas as i was walking out of the store i realize that not only am i not wearing a bra... i also neglected to put on underwear after my pre-lounge around shower!!

you here i am, on a friday night... not with my man, renting lame-ass movies...PRACTICALLY NAKED!!!!

and you know what else? last night, when i actually DID spend time with scott... guess what we did... we ordered a movie off of video on demand!!!! shoot me now!!!

My Sugar Daddy

2006-03-29T21:24:00.000-08:00

So Scott's getting over a cold, and he he came over Monday night to put Attie's crate back together, watch a movie, and just hang out. Well I'm cleaning up my bathroom and all of a sudden he stops and asks me, "What the hell is a sugar scrub?" Turns out, he had taken a shower at his place earlier that day and had come across my rose and sandalwood sugar scrub. Well apparently he was trying to get extra clean, thinking that getting rid of as many germs as possible would help him get well faster, and so he said he bathed himself like 5 times while he was in there. I keep a bunch of shower stuff over there, and he was bathing with everything he could get his hands on... haha, so he started using my stuff too!

He said, "I opened the jar and it was this grainy goop!! I didn't know what to do with it!! But i kinda liked the sandalwood. It smelled good."

How adorable is that?

I'm trying to get back to the gym these days. I kinda fell off the wagon over spring break and only worked out once. But I've re-stocked my kitchen with healthy food so I'm starting to feel more focused. I've been having this really great salad lately. I use the veggie lover's spring mix (which has mixed greens, carrots, broccoli, and pea pods!), sliced strawberries, feta cheese, walnuts, and Ken's Raspberry Vinagrette that Louise just turned me on to. If you're looking for a new salad, you'll love this!!

I got "The Soup Bible" for Christmas. I LOVE soup... of any kind, no matter how hot it is outside. I had yet to make anything out of it until tonight. I made this traditional Irish soup that was SO easy, SO good, and pretty good FOR you too!! Below is the recipe... I hope you like it as much as I did.

"Yellow Broth" (that's really what it's called)

2 tbsp butter
1 onion, minced
1 celery stalk, minced
1 carrot, finely chopped
2 tbsp all-purpose flour
3 and 3/4 cups chicken stock
1/4 cup medium steel oats (but I just used 2 cups cooked brown rice that I had from last night)
1 and 1/2 cups chopped spinach
2 tbsp cream
salt and pepper to taste

1) Melt butter in a large saucepan. Ad the onion, celery and carrot and cook for about 2 mins, until the onion begins to get soft.

2) Stir in the flour and cook slowly for 1 minute longer, stirring constantly. Pour in the chicken sotck and bring to a boil. Lower the heat, cover, and simmer for 30 mins, until the veggies are tender

3) Stir in oats (rice) and chooped spinach. Cook for 15 mins longer, stirring from time to time.

4) Slowly stir in cream and season with salt and pepper. Serve. YUM!!!!!

Gone Beachin'

2006-03-23T20:06:00.000-08:00

Well, Savannah was fun. There is absolutely NO TELLING how many calories I consumed on St. Patrick's day! We started with the beer, and then we'd eat, and then drink some more, and eat some more... this pattern wen ton for about 12 hours. OH so bad for me... but oh so fun!!!

I stayed in ATL for a few days after Savannah. Partly because I had to get my transmission rebuilt, and partly because I had a cardiologist appointment on Tuesday morning. I was kinda worried because I just had this feeling that he was going to tell me it was time for another cath. If this last valve was supposed to last 10 yrs, and I had it replaced when I was 19, then we're reaching the half-way point which means a cath is on the horizon. Well, I get in there... we do my EKG and Echo and then we see the Dr. again. Get this: He tells me that everything looks great!! He says my conduit is holding up wonderfully, and the pressures are excellent!! Then he says that I won't have to have a cath, let alone another heart surgery for a good long while... maybe even as long as a DECADE!!!! My mom (she went with me) and I were stoked!!! So yeah, that rocks pretty hard.

Jennifer's here now. It's always good to see her. We're supposed to be working on school, but instead I'm blogging. We had dinner at Macaroni Grill... a little tradition of ours. MMMmmm I love that place!! Tomorrow we leave with Jill for the beach. We'll probably be realy boring while we're there... mostly doing homework. But hey, at least we'll be laying on the beach while we're doing homework!! So yeah, Spring Break is going pretty well.

Dancing Queen

2006-03-12T21:35:00.000-08:00

Barrister's Ball was last night and it was awesome!!
Scott and I had so much fun. We stayed a lot longer, got to dance more... AND there was a chocolate fountain!! hell yeah!!

One thing I've always loved about Scott, and I was reminded of last night... is that Scott is the only man who has ever been able to lead me when we dance. I have a natural tendency to not let the guy lead. I don't mean to do it, but every guy I have ever dated, or ever danced with for that matter, has not been able to lead me. Except Scott.

I always know where to go when I'm dancing with him. And he doesn't sling me around, or man-handle me... he just subtley lets me know what to do. And the best part? When he leads me I look good!! He dips me and twirls me so that it looks like I know what I'm doing. The way we dance is sort of indicative of our whole relationship. I've never found a guy that I would follow anywhere. Nobody I respect enough to blindly trust them without know where I'll end up. And Scott likes to make me look good. He's moved here so that I can follow my dream, and is more concerned that i get what I want out of life.

Anyways, so last night was great. And how did our last dance end? With a wonderful dip kiss!! :-)

Countdown till Spring break: 5 days

Visiting Sister

2006-03-06T20:27:00.000-08:00

So my sister came to visit me this weekend. She called me up on thursday and asked if she could "just come hang out." For those of you who've known me long enough to know the relationship my sister and I have, you're probably trying to pic yourself up from off the floor right now. Yes, Lindsey actually requested to spend time with me!! How weird is that? For those of you who aren't familiar with our relationship, here's the jist: my sister hates me. Well, maybe hate is a strong word, but Lindsey REALLY doesn't care for me. She thinks I am judgemental, superficial, close-minded, and get this... wait for it... wait for it.... that I'm a "girly girl." Yes, me... a girly girl. We haven't really gotten along... well.. EVER really. We can tolerate each other for a few hours and that's about our max. So you can imagine that when she called me up out of nowhere and asked to come spend time with me I was floored to sat the least. In fact, our conversation went like this:
HER: Why do you sound so shocked Mandy?
ME: I'm not shocked, i just... Lindsey... you don't even like me!
HER: Yeah, I know, but everyone else is out of town.

So anyway, she showed up on friday afternoon, and the weekend went REALLY well. I'm still surprised about how we managed not to argue once in 48 whole hours!! Maybe she's decided I'm not so bad... or maybe I've just learned to shut my mouth when she starts attacking something I've just said and just be okay with letting her think she's right. Whatever the reason, I'm glad the weekend went well. I would really love a better relationship with her. It's really kind of sad how much I want a sister when I already have one.

OH! i heard a great quote in a movie last week that i'll leave you all with... "I'm helping you because some day I'm gonna need help moving a body, and when that day comes, I don't wanna hear any shit!"

Lent

2006-03-01T17:46:00.000-08:00

So, I've given up diet coke for Lent. This is going to be VERY hard for me. I probably only drink one a day, but when I drink it, i LOVE it!!! I've always had a hard time picking something to give up for Lent. Here's the thing... what's the first thing you think of to give up???... some sort of junk food right? Chocolate? Ice cream? Well, I've never done this because I know that if I give up something I should be cutting back o anyways, every time I deny myself this treat i won't think about Christ's sacrifice (the whole point of Lent), but instead I'll think of how not eating/doing that thing is going to benefit ME. Example: Instead of thinking about Christ when I slap my own hand away from the chips bag, I think about how much weight i'm going to lose. Soooooo not the point!

I've decided on diet coke because not drinnking it (at least in my mind) won't really bring me any benefits. Yeah yeah yeah, i know all that stuff about nutrisweet being bad for me, but i don't think that long term.

Soooooo... SURVEY: What did you give up for Lent?

I need ideas for next year.

Here Jill, I Posted

2006-02-19T22:38:00.000-08:00

I am not a Bad Ass. There. I said it.

I met someone last week (yes, I'm late in posting) who brought it to my attention just what a wuss I am. I've always kind of thought of myself as "tough," but maybe I'm really not. Yes, I hunt, and I fish, and I've played softball since I was 5, but while these things may make me tougher than some girls, none of these things are exactly "dangerous." I don't have any tatoos, the only piercings I have are on my ears, my sexual escapades are more than limited, I've never smoked anything other than the cigarette I once smoked to piss off Scott, and the only coke I've ever seen are the Diet ones sitting in my refrigerator. So that's it, i'm not a bad ass. I'm boring in fact. And I DON'T like it.

I want to be a risk-taker. I don't want to care what consequences my actions may bring. But the fact is that I do worry about what will happen if i do XYZ. I worry A LOT actually. And what makes taking risks so great? Especially when those risk don't bear a chance of anything really good happening?

Nonetheless, I want to be a bad ass. I want to flick off cops, and shoot tequila like it's iced tea, wear red leather pants that look like they should be illegal, and make people uneasy about what i'm gonna do next.

But instead, I've "been bad" by drinking a glass of merlot before bed (which actually might be risky as I'm not sure how long this bottle has been open), and should be up by 8 to get to school and work on my cross examination. The only rule breaking i'll be doing tomorrow will be the coffee I will attempt to sneak into the library. But I'll get it in there dammit... fear me Ed!!... and I'll sip on my chocolate velvet cofee that my mommy put in my stocking this Christmas and that will just have to be enough "bad ass" for a monday morning I suppose.

Amanda's Most Eligible Bachelors

2006-02-01T19:44:00.000-08:00

I have created a myspace page and thought you all might be particularly interested in teh "Amanda's Most Eligible Bachelor s" section of it. So I thought I'd post the site. Turn on your volume when you go though, so you can hear my song!! :-)

www.myspace.com/suzyq00000

Am I Negative?

2006-01-29T15:41:00.000-08:00

Question for all of you...

Okay, so sometimes when I'm nagging Scott (as I tend to do... hey, ya gotta be good at SOMETHING), he's accused me of being negative, and only focusing on the "bad parts" of our relationship.

Jennifer visited me this weekend and somehow we got on this topic. I asked her if she thought that was the case... Her reply? ... "Well, not negative really... more like 'solution oriented; and it sometimes can come off as negativity." She also said that I hadn't alwasy been this way... but have kind of grown into within the past couple years.

And then I had this thought... Has law school turned me into an negative person?

This scared the hell out of me!! I mean, I have always prided mysel on being the eternal optimist. And I'm talking, so optimistic that it's borderline annoying... that people just wanna shake me and yell, "This situation sucks Amanda, just admit that this sucks and quit trying to find the silver lining... the 'what have we learned from this?' and just admit that life really blows right now!!!"

Has that changed? Has lawschool tainted my little rose-colored glassses? Or is it something besides law school? Is it that I'm slowly realizing that I'm not in college anymore (read think "We're not in Kansas anymore Toto") and that the real world will soon bite me in the ass? Is it having to leave all my wonderful friends in Athens and start over in Birmingham? Or is this just soemthing that was kind of there all along?

Okay people... feedback time!!! And this means pushing that little link down at the bottom called "Comment" that we all pretend isn't really there.

My Life Is Over

2006-01-22T23:29:00.000-08:00

Here is the IM conversation I just had with Heath:

AlaLawJHL: did you see that NBC canceled your show?
SuzyQ00000: what show?
AlaLawJHL: west wing
SuzyQ00000: WHAT?!?!?!?!?
SuzyQ00000: are you kidding?
AlaLawJHL: nope
AlaLawJHL: i showed jill the link
SuzyQ00000: heath don't toy with me
SuzyQ00000: you're kidding
AlaLawJHL: nope
AlaLawJHL: afraid not
AlaLawJHL: last show airs in may
AlaLawJHL: http://tv.yahoo.com/news/ap/20060122/113796696000.html
SuzyQ00000: Noooooooooooooooooooooo
SuzyQ00000: i just spent 6 hours this weekend watching the 5th season on dvd
SuzyQ00000: what am i going to do without my west wing???
AlaLawJHL: start watching the OC?
AlaLawJHL: CSI?
AlaLawJHL: obsessing over me?
AlaLawJHL: btw
AlaLawJHL: cani tell you how much i wish i hadnt signed up for basic, miss jordan
SuzyQ00000: i can't talk right now heath
SuzyQ00000: i've lost my will to live
AlaLawJHL: im sorry
AlaLawJHL: it was all a lie, aj
AlaLawJHL: i was just joshin ya
AlaLawJHL: west wing is safe
SuzyQ00000: no you're not
AlaLawJHL: forever and ever
SuzyQ00000: i just read the article!
SuzyQ00000: it's true
SuzyQ00000: and the truth hurts heath
AlaLawJHL: umm
AlaLawJHL: i wrote all of that
AlaLawJHL: all a big charade
SuzyQ00000: stop heath, stop trying to sheild me from the cold realities of this thing we call life
SuzyQ00000: it's better to have watched and lost than to never had watched at all!!!

... and with that my life was over :-( Only one thing to do... go sulk in the tub with a root beer.

Shower Fetish

2006-01-22T15:19:00.000-08:00

Okay, so my dog is a pervert. Every time I take a shower she gets between the shower curtain and the plastic sheild thingy and just sits there while i shower... watching me!! i told scott this this afternoon while I was showering at his place, and he said that when she stays with him she does the same thing every time he gets in the shower too. If she's watching me AND scott... is my dog playing for both teams??? Or maybe it's just that she's waiting till we get done so that she can jump in and roll around in the wet tub... yeah, my dog's weird.

Fajita Florentine Pasta???

2006-01-19T16:25:00.000-08:00

Oh. My. Gosh. I'm sorry, but I just have to brag on the dinner I just made myself. I think it will a new favorite.

Okay, so i wanted fajitas last night, but i kinda had to improvise. I sauteed an onion, a yellow pepper, and a red pepper. Then I threw in some thawed chunks of the smoked turkey leftover from thanksgiving that i had brought home with me and frozen. Then, copying something I had seen at a mexican restaurant in atlanta, i also stirred in some chopped spinach. I ate this on corn tortillas and topped them with the leftover queso i had at Moe's the night before.

Okay, but tonight wins. I took the rest of the fajita mix (the onions, peppers, turkey, and spinach), boiled some whole wheat pasta, and then went after the rest of the queso. I heated the queso in a saucepan, stirring in some skim milk to thin it out. I added the pasta to the skillet that I had used to wamr up the fajita mix, and then stirred in my new cheese sauce. MMMMM MMMMM MMMMM!!!!! This pasta dish was SO good, and pretty healthy for me i think with all the veggies, the whole wheat past, and the thinned out cheese. It will become a staple i think.

I know... I get excited about weird stuff.

The Nutshell Series: My Christmas Break

2006-01-16T21:46:00.000-08:00

Alright, FINALLY here is your long-awaited “Christmas Break Re-Cap!!!” Quick, go get your popcorn… I’ll wait ;-)

Well, the first big event was the hunting trip. I had a blast. Scott met my Dad, my Mom, and I in Mobile where we spent a day with my Grandma and Grandaddy, my cousin Paige and her husband and daughter, plus my Aunt Pam and Uncle Don. We had a great meal, and then all the boys played poker. Haha, the fun part was when the women would suddenly announce “Ladies Round!!” and then we’d play a round of poker with all the chips our men had just spent the last 30 mins winning. The looks on their faces was perhaps the best Christmas present. Muahahaha!! But who won Ladies’ Round?? ME!! Go Me!!

The next day Scott, my Dad, and I left Grandma’s and headed to my Uncle Ben’s farm. I’ve blogged about this place before… truly one of my favorite places on earth. We met my cousin Michael and hurried to get in position before the sun went down. The point of this trip was for me to get my first deer. I had been a few times with Dad and had had no luck, so this time I sat in the stand with Michael. I swear we hadn’t even been there 20 minutes before a doe walked out. We watched her for probably 20 more minutes waiting on a buck that might be behind her, but none came out. I shot a gun Michael had bought for his wife. A “red dot scope.” It was very light weight, with an even lighter trigger. I loved it. So I got my first deer at a little over 100 yards, which I was even more excited about when I found out there was no magnification on that scope. 100 yards on the equivalent of an iron sight had me pretty excited.

I was knocked down a notch when we got back to the house. My younger cousin, Reece, 10 years old asked if this was my first deer. When I said yes, he asked, “You mean your first deer of the season right?” When I said no, he looked me up and down and said, “You’re a little big to be getting your first deer aren’t you?” Wow, thanks Reece. Damn, sure felt like city girl then. Oh well.

We spent the night at my Aunt Paula’s house. We got up the next morning and tried for another deer, but no luck. That afternoon, we met my uncle Doug and some more of the cousins for a dove shoot. Nobody had any luck with the birds. The wind was blowing too hard and it was too cold we think. Oh well, I shot at a few that flew by me but were way out of range. Knew I wouldn’t hit them, but sometimes it’s just fun to shoot at shit ya know? Pictures from my Mobile trip are on my facebook page. I haven’t figured out how to put pictures on this thing yet… or I guess the more accurate statement is… I haven’t made Scott put pictures on her for me yet.

The rest of the break was boring, but still good. Scott and I spent a lot of time at each other’s family’s houses. Yep, lots of family, lots of food (which certainly wasn’t a good thing for the diet) and end LOTS LOTS LOTS of board games. Scott had to go to the Chicago area for his uncle’s funeral, and so he missed New Year’s Eve. Can you believe we’ve NEVER gotten to spend a New Year’s Eve together? Isn’t that crazy? Something always happens. The first year we were still not seriously dating and so we were in different cities, the next two years Scott was working at the Ritz and so he would have to work their parties, last year I was far too drunk for it to count in my opinion, and then this year with the funeral. Maybe one day we’ll get to spend it together. I told Scott that we’re gonna have to get married on a New Year’s Eve Day, so that I KNOW that night we’ll be together.

The end of the break was kind of sac with everything that I told you about with my Gramps. And by the time I got back to Bham class was in full swing. It seems like something always happens to keep me from getting to town enough time ahead of classes starting to feel like I have all my ducks in a row before I have to go to my first class. This semester is no different. I feel totally unorganized.. Grrrrr!!!

Mean Mommies!!

2006-01-12T15:59:00.000-08:00

Okay, so there's this park by my apt complex that I've just found. It's a really small area, that's fenced in with a small playground off to the side and a cement walkway going all around the inside of the fence. I've driven by a few times and the place has been deserted. So today I took Attie there to run. Well I get there and the park is COVERED UP with mommies!! I mean, there are women and their small children EVERYWHERE!!! I had planned on letting Attie off her leash so she could run around, but now I couldn't do that... that was okay though. I decided I could still run if i kept her on the leash and made the leash really short when we went close to the playground area.

Well I started walking around the walkway, and then IT HAPPENED! I noticed all the mothers giving me dirty looks!! And gripping their children every time Attie and I would go by. And one time this little boy ran over wanting to pet Attie, and his mom yelled after him, "Don't you touch that dog!!!" What the poo?!?! Attie's not diseased! She's not going to maul your stupid nose-picking kid! She's not dirty! UGH!!!

Okay, I realize where these mothers were coming from. They don't know me, and they don't know my dog. For all they knew, Attie WAS a biter. But I mean, c'mon! It's not like I was running around with a doberman... Attie's not even 30lbs yet! I guess I just felt like it was rude. It hurt my feelings!! At the very least they could have been a little more subtle about it. I vowed that when i have kids I will at least be polite about my irrational fear of puppies. GRRRRrrrrrr!!!

Gramps

2006-01-06T21:13:00.000-08:00

I know I owe you the Christmas break update, but first I wanted to write about the end of my break. A lot of you know that he was end the hospital at the end of finals, and thought he was doing better, he was still in there when I got home. He was better in a couple days though and ended up getting to go back to the nursing home. For a little background… my Gramps had a stroke 9 years ago that left his right side paralyzed and also left him without the ability to speak. I guess I should re-phrase that, he’s able to speak, but the only sound he can make is “Muh muh muh.” He still has his mind though and using voice inflection and facial gestures can mean anything from, “Yes, I’d like some more coffee,” “Where’s your mom?” “Wow, you look really nice today,” and, “Have some of this pizza, I’m not gonna eat it all.” Sounds crazy, but if you were ever around him, you know how well he communicated. Of course, the better you knew him, the better you were at “guessing” what he was saying. Watching my mom talk with him blew me away. She was always much better at deciphering than I was. But then, I guess that’s just the father-daughter relationship for ya.

When he came back from the hospital he still didn’t seem like he was really feeling himself. He wasn’t as cheerful, and he really wasn’t eating as much as he normally does. Bear in mind my Gramps can out eat most of us… he eats a TON. Of course, I guess if I had nothing better to do than tool around the nursing home I’d start eating everything in sight too. Anyways, the last Friday in December my Mom, Dad, and I had gone to the nursing home for Friday Night Pizza. My parents visited my Gramps EVERY day since he became a resident in the nursing home (5 years ago), and on Friday nights they always brought something special for dinner. Sometimes it was Sonny’s BBQ, or Chinese, but usually it was pizza. Gramps’ table loved pizza. Speaking of tables, my Gramps SO hung with the cool corwd at the home. They were the nurses favorites and they sat at the dining table together, and there was a matching “girls cool crowd” that my Gramps flirted shamelessly with, that is… when he wasn’t flirting with the nurses. Anyway, that night Gramps only ate a slice and a half of pizza, when he normally eats like 4 or 5. He was in good spirits, but my mom was getting worried about his appetite and gave him a little lecture. After going down a list of foods that she could think of bringing him the next day, they finally agreed that fudge sounded god to him, and that if she made it he would eat it.

The next morning the nurse on duty called my Dad’s cell phone and told him that my Gramps had a “change of consciousness” that morning and my mom and I rushed over there. When we got there Gramps just seemed kind of out of it, and pretty non-responsive. His blood pressure had shot up and we called an ambulance. When they got there they said his blood pressure was 216 over something I couldn’t hear. I rode in the ambulance with Gramps while my Mom followed behind us. When we got to the ER Gramps started having seizures. They got him calmed down, stopped the seizures, and admitted him… but he still wasn’t really responding to us when we talked to him. Over the next couple days we found out that the first time he had gone in the hospital the doctor changed his dosage of anti-seizure medication and hi sbody stopped absorbing it. The doctors also think this may have caused another stroke because his ability to swallow started getting bad. They were feeding him throught he IV, but he hadn’t eaten anything more than a couple bites of vanilla pudding and some chocolate milkshake I fed him. And he just looked awful. He looked tired, and pissed off, and groggy.

New Year’s Day my mom and I left the hospital. It was about 11pm. Dad was going to spend the night with him so that mom could get some sleep. Her sister was flying in the next night because they were going to run some tests and see if there really had been another stork and if this no-swallowing business was permanent. If it was, that was gone be REALLY bad. That would mean a feeding tube and Gramps would really hate that. And if his ability to respond was gone, if he couldn’t’ communicate with us, I don’t even want to think about how that would have torn up my mom. At 5 a.m. the next morning my sister woke me up. Dad had called and they had just ordered a code cart on Gramps. We threw on clothes and raced to the hospital. He was gone when we got there.

Dad said he went really peacefully. That he passed in his sleep, and Dad never heard a sound. I’m sad. But, I’m also relived. If Gramps had decreased his quality of life any further he would have been miserable. I know this sounds weird… but I was alone with him for about 3 hours on New Year’s Day. I kept trying to get him to eat, and he tried really hard for me, I think he knew how badly I wanted him to eat something. It was like he was just eating because he knew it would make me happy. And as I sat there holding his hand he just looked at me.. and with his eyes I swear to you, he told me he was ready to go. I felt this so much it was all I could do not to say out loud, “I know you’re ready, and it’s okay.” And after he told me this, the next morning he was gone. I know that sounds far fetched… but I guess he had gotten so good at communicating without words that he knew how to tell me something like that by just looking at me.

The funeral was okay. My Gramps was always really patriotic. He had flags all over his house, and even in his nursing home room. Mom and her sisters picked out this really pretty grey-blue casket that had eagles holding little flags on each corner. It looked like Gramps. My mom has a pretty small family and we were short a man so I served as the 6th pallbearer. It was really sad, but I felt like I was able to do one last thing for him.

In the car the other day, my mom was talking about how many people came up to her at the nursing home and told her how much they would miss my Gramps. All the little things they would miss about him. My Dad said to my Mom, “It doesn’t take much to change people’s lives, and your Dad did it everyday with just a smile.”

I strive to be like him.

Tired

2005-12-10T23:25:00.000-08:00

Well, just one more final left to go. I took my Torts 2 final today and got home around 5:30. I had a bowl of Campbell's and went to take a "nap," around 7. Ummm, yeha, I woke up at 11pm. Whoops. There goes my idea of going dancing tonight to blow off steam. Sooooo... now it's too late to do anything, i'm too worn out to study, buttoo awake to go back to sleep. Solution? WINE! I finished off the other half of the bottle that i had slowly been working on all week... and needless to say I am feeling very happy right now :-) Of course, all that will change in the morning when I have to trudge BACK to the library. I'm so tired from finals. I realy don't rememer bing this tired last semester. I'm mentally and physically exhausted. Okay, well I'm gonn try to hit the sack. I have big plans of getting up at 8 and going to lift weights befor eI meet jill for breakfast at 10... we'll see what happens? Any betters out there??

Messed Up Dream

2005-12-08T21:43:00.000-08:00

Well, three exams down and two to go. I had a nightmare last night. I dreamed that I discovered that I was really adopted and that my real dad was Professor Bishop (last year's scary contracts professor) and that my real mom was some ficitional visting professor. When I woke up I was so disturbed that I serioulsy thought I was going to cry. It really started freaking me out and then I realized that come to think of it... I had never really seen any pictures of my mom when she was pregnant with me.

At this point I truly panicked and called my mother. She promptly laughed at me and replied, "Who told you?" Thanks mom. I tried all day to get in touch with my dad... his response? "Oh yeah, we have some pictures of you rmom with a pillow under her shirt. You can look at those if you want." Thanks dad. THEN I decided that if this were true I would know already, because there is no way in HELL that my grandmother could keep a secret for more thana week let alone 24 years. God bless Grandma, her big mouth, and all the security that they both bring :-)

You wanna know the really sad part of the whole thing though? I remmeber thinking in the dream... when I first found out that my professors were my real parents... "Hmmm I wonder if this will ge tme a better grade." Isn't that terrible?!?! I hate exam time!!!

And Hell Begins

2005-11-29T22:40:00.000-08:00

Before the hell of finals starts I though I better jot down a few of the things that have been going on lately.
A couple things to note:

1) The other night I got in my flannel PJs, poured a big glass of wine, I had my dog at my feet, and was working on something that made feel like it couldn’t sleep knowing it was unfinished. I looked at what I was doing, and then it hit me…. I HAVE BECOME MY MOTHER!!! It’s official.

2) Why do they call them pig tails? I mena, I get when you put your hair up in one bunch it’s called a pony tail, because… well, it looks like a pony’s tail. But how does putting your hair up to come out of both sides of your head have anything to do with pigs?

3) Something that made me happy the other day... I wore my Christmas socks :-) I grinned every time I looked down at my feet.

And now the Thanksgiving re-cap:
Hmmm, tehre really wasn't that much going on at my house. Lots of eating and studying, and then more eating for me. Scott and I camped out in front of Circuit City Thursday night so that we could get him some silly hard drive that was on mega sale. Dad, Scott, jeremy and I all went shooting Sunday, which is always tons of fun. I got to see my cousin Michael a couple times because he was spending the holiday with his wife's family in Atl. Michael is the epitome all that is country. When I think of "The Jordans" I think of Michael. Friday night we took he and his wife to Maggiano's which is a really nice restaraunt in Buckhead. That was interetedting to say the least. Let's just say I'm glad it was loud in there that night. Especially since Michael could never talk about "you" and "I"... instead it was always "yo ass" and "my ass." He's really a great guy though, and one of my favorite cousins.
After finals i'm gonna go stay with my aunt paula for a bit and let Michael teach me some farming stuff like my dad used to learn. I asked Michael if he could teach me how to "work a cow." His response? "Naw, but I'll show you how to chop a bull's nut sack off." Scott says he really doesn't want me to learnhow to castrate ANYTHING... but I figure, how many girls can say they've castrated a bull? Not many!! I'll tel you that. A real resume builder I'd say. Hobbies: Deep sea fishing, cross-stitch, bull castration :-)

The Perfect Ending

2005-11-16T20:36:00.000-08:00

Well the Anniversary was ruined... sort of. I got to Scott's and gave him his card and his pic/writing. He made fun of how cheesey/mushy I am but then told me he really liked it. And I have to say, it turned out PERFECT! Then he took me to O'Charley's... nothing fancy, but we both LOVE that place.

Then I drove him to the laser tag place, and he still had no idea where we were going. But here's where the ruined part comes in. I talked to the guy on the phone about it on monday and told him I was coming in, but that there would be only two of us. He said he couldn't promise there would be anybody else there on a week night and that it might not be as much fun with only 2 of us and that we should really try to get a group. Well, I couldn't get a group together, plus I thought it WOULD be kinda fun just Scott v. Me.. but when we got there the guy wouldn't let us in. He had turned all the lights off because nobody had shown up (well who's gonna come in with al the lights off buddy!?!?), and he wouldn't turn everything on for just the two of us. I was PIIIIIIISSED!!! He never said anything about there being a possibility that we wouldn't get to play at all!! Scott said not to worry about it, and that we would get a group together this weekend to play. But he DID go on and on about what a good job I had done thinking of something fun and different to do, so that made me feel a little better.

And you know what I started thinking? What a nice testament about what it means to love someone. Love isn't the way you feel when everything is going perfect. It's the way you feel when NOTHING is going according to plan. The way you lift each other up when things aren't what you expected. The way that love is there no matter what, and when you're evening plans get ruined... in all honesty, you're really just as happy cuddling on the couch in the other one's arms.

We couldn't do what Scott has planned for me last night because he says we have to wait till we're in ATL next week... so who knows what he has up his sleeve. I have a few ideas.. but I really can't tell what he's planning. Since we were both still stuffed from dinner we mostly just cuddled on the couch the rest of the night. the best part of the evening though??.... As I was falling asleep I asked Scott what his favorite part of our relationship was. His resonse? "You." And then he kissed me on the forehead and I went to sleep smiling. What a perfect ending to a "not according to plan" evening. :-)

Four Years!!!

2005-11-14T22:55:00.000-08:00

Today Scott and I have been together for four years!!! How crazy is that?!?!?! His card reads:

For our Anniversary I present to you:
something practical,
something neat,
something sexy,
something sweet!

What is he getting you ask?

Something practical - a subscription to Computer Power User magazine... yes he really IS that big of a nerd!

Something neat - I'm taking him to play laser tag, and since it's on a week night we'll probably be the only ones in the arena, which I think will be cool. It started out as me wanting to do that sumo wrestling thing where you put on the fat suits, but that didn't work out. So this will have to do.

Something sexy - well, that's none of your business now is it? C'mon... I'm pretty open with my blogs, but i'm not THAT open!

Something sweet - jennifer took a great picture of he and I the other weekend and I'm putting it in a frame next to this thing I wrote for him.

Hopefully he'll like it all. it still amazes me that we've been together this long. Four years feels like an eternity, but I still feel like I just met him last year. Odd huh?

When Did Messy Hair Become Sexy?

2005-11-07T21:09:00.000-08:00

I say again: When did messy hair become sexy? Last night I went to sleep with my hair wet with the intention of straightening it this morning before school. Well, OF COURSE, I woke up late and didn't have time for the 15 minute straightening session so I just threw some mousse in it and ran out the door. It was kinda wavy, and I thought it looked like crap, but I got more compliments on it than I think I have EVER gotten on my hair before. And the odd part?... they were ALL from guys. It was the strangest thing! I had one guy tell me my hair looked "sexed up." Mike told me it was that nice "Just got out of bed look." Well.. that was because I HAD just gotten out of bed! I stopped by Scott's to pick up Attie's leash that I had left over there and he got this weird look in his eye and this funny little grin and simply said "You look pretty." Well, hell, if I can get that many compliments by rolling out of bed and looking like crap... SIGN ME UP!!!

This May be TMI

2005-11-02T17:50:00.000-08:00

Preface: If you're a shy reader ignore this post. If, however, you're friends with me you've probably already dealt with the fact taht my life is a book and I constantly give out TMI... in which case... you may read on.

Okay, so I often get out of the shower and lay back down in my towel for a bit before getting dressed. It lets my hair air dry a little and I get to sneak in 20 more minutes of shut eye. Well this morning I was doing just that. I had flopped down on my bed post-shower and Attie had snuggled up next to me. I was about to drift off for a little nap when "OUCH Attie!! That hurt!" You guessed it, Attie bit the crap out of my, well, um... you-know-what (it rhymes with "bipple.") YEAH! So let's just say that I am NOT looking forward to breast feeding, and any little ankel-biters I have will be hittin' the bottle faster than you can say "Pampers!"

Birthday Weekend

2005-10-31T19:04:00.000-08:00

Well, I had just a FABULOUS weekend!! Thursday, my birthday, I woke up to streamers and balloons all over my front door, plus window paint and even more streamers on my car. My side windows said "Honk if you're 24." I didn't get any honks but I certainly got some strange looks. My locker looked about like my car, and I was forced to carry around a HUGE red ballon and wear a peach boa. I got some wonderful gifts, and that night Scott and I went to the SBA Halloween party as sa pimp and his ho. Yes, I realize this costume is played out (forgive the pun) but his pimp suit was killer! And man, did i look like a whore!! The best were the clear heel I bought that lit up when I took a step. I MUST find some more occasiosn to wear those!

Friday and Saturday were pretty laid back. Jennifer was in town, and moslty we all sat around wathing football and movies. Sunday night my friends planned a surprise party. They did a great job keeping it a secret, because I HAD NO IDEA!! Scott and I were on a double date with Jeremy and Jamie, and i just thought they had blindfolded us both so that Jeremy could look suave in front of jamie. Little did I know that Jamie did NOT have a blindfold on! Little sneaks!! It was a wonderful surprise.

I fell off the diet wagon over the weekend howvever and couldn't bring myself to go running today either. BOO on me! Ate okay today though, and did some strenght training. Still not enough. Tomorrow Attie and I will go for a run. Hold me to it guys!!!

This next part is for Jen (as she was teasing me this weekend about always writing about the view off scott's old apt): The view out the back of Scott's NEW apt is okay. You can't see as far as the old place and there are more trees in the way. but there are also more lights in this new view, so the night time is prettier than the old place. HA JEN!!

Fall

2005-10-04T15:55:00.000-07:00

I’m sitting on the first floor of the library right now, trying to read about corporations (ugh!), and I just happened to notice something moving outside the window. As I look out I see that it’s a leaf blowing across the grass,, and I’m suddenly filled with such a sense of soothing, comforting, excitement. I LOVE FALL!!! I’ve been noticing that the season is indeed on it’s way… pumpkins are in the grocery stores, it’s a tad nippy in the early morning when I take Attie out, and as I look around the classroom I notice that there are less and less flip flops, and more and more smart looking box-toed heels. While I’ve been noticing all of these things, for whatever reason it wasn’t until just now, as I watched the leaves roll across the grass, that it TRULY hit me that it is once again Autumn.

While, the thought of this excites me… as it is by FAR my favorite season… I’m a little sad. I don’t think you can ever really appreciate Fall like you can when you’re an undergrad at UGA. Aside from North Campus being nothing short of stunning, there’s an excitement in wondering what lies ahead for this new school year, and hell, your entire LIFE for that matter. You are reminded that you’re in college! You have your whole life ahead of you and there is a renewed confidence that it is sure to be even more spectacular that you can imagine. And while I’m still in law school and not in the “real world,” so technically the rest of my life is STILL in front of me, it’s not the same kind of innocent anticipation that I think goes along with those college days. No longer am I under the impression that the perfect job will find ME, that grades will always come somewhat easily to me, or that people can never make me doubt myself and what I am capable of.

I miss the days when some of my biggest worries included having everything prepared to lead Monday night’s chapter meeting, convincing House Corp to buy new lighting fixtures, figuring out which night I would drive to Eatonton to see Scott, scoring the good student tickets, what I would wear to the social, skipping class on a Friday afternoon so I could go to the bo-bo Athens mall and buy a scandalous shirt from The Body Shop that would ONLY be appropriate in downtown Athens, and that I could probably never wear again, but that was okay because I only spent $7 on it.

So I know by now, those of you in law school are thinking, AMANDA… those are the kind of piddly worries we have now!! We fill our weekends with Ramenpalooza, bowling leagues, fantasy football tourneys, “studying” at Starbucks, out of control sushi habits, and gossip that takes us back to high school. And while you’re right… I still am worried about silly stuff… the Fall innocence isn’t there like it used to be because the real world seems so much closer than it was while I was still at Georgia. The magic bubble that is “COLLEGE DAYS!!” puts you in this euphoric state where you think, “now I see why mom and dad are always telling stories from their college days,” “so THIS is what it’s all about” where Fun is the name of the game, and the real world will work itself out later… after all, we’re all smart if we got into college right?

In undergrad fun was all there was… in law school the fun is just what we do to distract ourselves from the reality that we’re all about to be thrown to the wolves and what if we can’t hack it? Fall used to bring with it a magic innocence… and while that Autumn magic is still there, and for me it probably always will be… now there’s also this sense of, “Holy shit! I’m one year closer to having to really follow through with all the stuff I’ve told myself I’m destined to do. I can’t really do this stuff! Great, myself is really gonna be pissed off at me when she finds out what an idiot I am.”

Sunday morning

2005-09-25T10:23:00.000-07:00

Attie and I took a short walk this morning and guess what she did... a leaf was blowing down the street and she stopped and pointed at it!! Like, nose out, foot bent up, pointed!! YAY! Baby's first point!

Right now sh'e s asleep on my laptop key board... I'm trying to type around her. I'm about to leave and go to the library, as I have a HUGE brief due tomorrow that i've barely started on. Luckily it's just for an in-school competition and not for a grade or anything.

The sky right now is so pretty. It looks like it's about to storm and there's this wonderful shade of purple-grey coming up over the hill. I think this shade should be called "uh oh grey," because it looks like hte sky's about to fall out!

Feeling Sluggish

2005-09-19T21:37:00.000-07:00

I had a totally unproductive (but oh-so-fun) weekend, and I can feel an equally unproductive week ahead. The problem with this is that I really can't afford to be unproductive right now. While I've been pseudo keeping up with my reading... or at least keeping up with my outlines, i feel way behind in school. Con law has me confused, and I don't really see an end to that in sight. It takes me a whole day to digest what should only take a couple of hours. Why am I having such a hard time wrapping my head around that subject?

This Moot Court brief is looming over me. It just seems like such a huge and daunting task that i can't force myself to just tackle it head on.

I need a mantra to ignite my motivation. I think for the week I will adopt Rule #3 according to my mother: Cleats Up!

Yeah, "Cleats Up!" Here I come week of hell! I've got a mantra and I'm not afraid to use it!

A Quickie

2005-09-16T17:31:00.000-07:00

Okay Mike, go a head and commence with the jokes about the title. I fully expect them :-) Not much going on with me folks, or atleast nothing that prompts an soul searching writing from me today. So instead, I'll give you a brief update on my life.

1. I miss Scott a lot lately. His job has him working crazy hours, and while i can't complain because well, he has a job, I still miss him tons. I feel like a working single mom struggling to raise her pup.

2. Jennifer's first day of work was today. I haven't talked to her yet, but I'm sure it went great. You can't help but love Jen, and I'm sure everyone there is already head-over-heels for her. She's working at DFACS, and is a little worried about the job wearing her down... but I know she can do it. She's tackled way tougher stuff than this before and she's always come out on top. (hehe, on top... again for you mike)

3. Had a real nice and relaxing dinner with Heath last night. Always good to spebd some quality alone time with one of your "I don't see enough of him" type friends.

4. Jill and I have been doing really well at getting our walking in lately. Go us! Hope we can keep it up. I'm so fat these days... even fatter than normal. UGH!

5. Going to a Welcome Home party tonight for my friend Paul. He's in the National Guard and has been in NOLA for about 3 weeks helping out down there. I only got to see him for a second yesterday at school. He was sunburned, and he looked tired. Hopefully we can give him a proper welcome. My goal for the evening: Drink an entire bottle of red wine...mmm... okay, well, maybe just an entire glass of red wine... either way I plan on kicking back.

6. Does not being able to operate a baby gate make me a moron? I think so. Great, just another reason why I shouldn't procreate.

7. Attie's growing every day! She's learning some things, but we're still working on the house training. One command she DEFINITELY doesn understand yet is "You can't have any!" Every time I fix dinner she whines and pitches a fit because I won't give her my meal. That has to stop.

8. My laptop bag broke. :-( I'm sad because I really loved this bag. It was a red leather one and if I can't get it fixed I'll be super bummed.

9. I'm currently working on my brief for the Moot Court competition, and also gearing up for the Haley trial competition. Street Law starts next week too. I'm getting busier... and I like it :-)

10. Scott's sister Katy is my new sister!! She pledged DG at Vanderbilt Wednesday night!! Woo Hoo!! I hope she really likes the girls she meets there. It won't break my heart though if she decides it's not for her. I just want her happy.

Alright, well that's all folks. I hope everyone has an awesome weekend. OH, and GO DAWGS!!

All About Attie

2005-09-11T21:43:00.000-07:00

I named this entry "All About Attie," because that's really what my life seems like lately. Ever since I brought her home my schedule has been dictated by her schedule. I'm waking up an HOUR earlier in the morning (which if you know me at all, you know this is a BIG deal) to make sure she has enough time to eat, play, and "do her business" before I have to leave for school. On my long breaks between class I'm rushing home to let her out, and then rushing back to school. Staying at Scott's is out of the question anymore, since transporting her anywhere is a big hassle, not to mention sh'ed freak out if she was sleeping in her travel crate in a strange place. When I'm at home with her, I'm having to watch her EVERY SECOND to make sure she doesn't get into something she's not supposed to, or have an accident on the carpet. Speaking of accidents... Lesson #1: Attie does NOT get to hang out on my bed while I'm getting ready for school!! That was a particularly gross lesson or me to have to learn. :-(

Now don't get me wrong, aside from all this extra work and worry... Attie and I are having a great time. I was starting to doubt my motherly instincts because I didn't feel like I was astaken with her cute puppiness as perhaps I should be. I think a lot of this is because I've spent the last 6 months cooing over puppies at PetSmart every saturday, that I'm kind of "puppied out." So for me, I think the enjoyment I'm getting out of her is less about the cuteness (although I have some really cute stories that I'll get into in a mintue), and more about the excitement and anticipation of the new companionship I've found... which I'm sure will grow stronger than it already is once she stops crapping all over the place ;-)

Since getting Attie, I've broken down and bought a digital camera, which should be coming in the mail any day now. When it does I'll start taking lots of pics nad posting them online somewhere for you guys. Till then, here are a couple cute stories:

1. She's started closing the door to her crate! When I take her out of it, she'll turn around and shut the door!! It's like she's doing it in defiance, it's hilarious.

2. We've discovered that she loves ice. She'll lick it and then it'll shoot across the room and she'll chase it all over the apartment, because everytime she catches it it just scoots right out of her paws.

3. She falls asleep in my lap a lot and absolutley pitches a fit if i try to move her out of it. She'll grunt and just climb right back in until I leave her alone, and then look at me like "Geez mom! I'm trying to sleep here!"

4. If I throw a toy toward the hall to the door, she'll chase after it and slide halway down the hall on the linoleum.

Puppy's Here!!!

2005-09-04T16:40:00.000-07:00

Well I finally have my puppy and she's beautiful! She's mostly liver with lots of ticking. She takes to people really well... loves to snuggle, which is cute but that also means she hates to be a lone which has already proven to make crate training difficult. Her name is ATTIE, after 1) Atticus Finch, the model attorney in "To Kill a Mockingbird," and 2) Ate, the goddess of mischief (yes, you probably don't pronounce "ate" like "attie," but i don't care.) Anyway, i'm amazed by how attached I already am to her. I'll try to figure out how to post pictures of her online so y'all can have a look.

I'd tell you to enjoy your Labor Day, but if you're a Cumberland student you'll be deprived of your opportunity to celebrate the Labor movement and capitalism, as we are required to go to class. Damn communists!

TWO!

2005-09-01T21:21:00.000-07:00

TWO! That's right folks tomorrow is Puppy Day!!

Today was a good day. I like how my thursdays feel like Fridays now since I only have the one class on Friday. I was able to go for a run between classes to. I ran on this trail that's kinda hidden from the road, lots of tree coverage, and where you run next to the creek. It was a pretty run, and it felt great outside. An open sprint through the woods feels amazing.

My apartment is so messy and I'm too tired to clean it before i leave tomorrow for class and the ATL right afterward. Guess I better hit the hay. Tomorrow, whe you wake up, know that it is PUPPY DAY! and I should update tomorrow night after I pick her up.

Puppy Countdown - THREE!

2005-08-31T22:39:00.000-07:00

Unless you've been completely oblivious to anything I've been saying these days, you know by now that I get my new puppy this weekend. I apologize to those of you who have seen me a lot this week, as I'm sure that I remind you of my mother-to-be status every chance I get. So I thought it was time time to start the 3 day Puppy Countdown. Alright, so TECHNICALLY it's past midnight, so there are only 2 days till i get my puppy, but since I haven't gone to sleep yet, i'm going to still count it as Wednesday. So here's the official countdown... ready?... THREE! (to be continued)

Procrastinating on Sunday night

2005-08-28T19:56:00.000-07:00

Haha, let's review what a cheapo i am!! So yesterday afternoon I had a craving for mexican. I went to On the Border where they have this create your own combo thing that Jen and I usuallysplit and are addicted to. Well, it comes with Empanadas (whichare these wonderful little mexican pastries filled with chicken/beef and ooey-gooey cheese that i suggest you all try pronto), a taco, black beans and rice. So i eat the empanadas and taco, and I ask for a box for the rice and beans. THEN i put the left over tortilla chips in the box too. I KNOW at this point that i have hit bottom when it comes to being cheap. So anyway, I made a 2nd meal off the rice and beans, and a 3rd meal off the chips and some beans and cheese that i had at home which i turned into nachos. So 3 meals for the low low price of $9. But I finished the nachos a little bit ago and was reflecting on how pathetic this whole escapade was. Now don't get me wrong, I'm not gonna stop being a cheap-ass, because I prefer to think of it as grugal planning, but DAMN!

So since I've been posting kind of sad stuff lately I thought I'd fill you all in on something that i'm SO happy about. I've probably already told most of you, but Jen may be coming to Birmingham!!! She's interviewed for a ton of psychology research positions at UAB and is waiting to hear back. She also recently got into the Psych Masters program at Walden Universtiy (go her!), which is online so she can work on that anywhere she ends up. So everybody keep their fingers crossed that UAB huries up and realizes that they've got an opportunity to work witht he world's next great psychologist!

Not The Same

2005-08-26T23:32:00.000-07:00

School has started back. Fun in some ways… sad in others. I’ve grown to feel more and more like Harry Potter. If any of you have begun to enjoy the 6^th book in the series, you know that this is the year that Harry and his friends have passed their O.W.L.S. This means that the classes in which they do well, they can continue to study. Naturally, Harry and his friends, Ron and Hermoine, have done well in different courses, are continuing in different courses, and therefore are being separated. That’s kind of how I feel. All my friends from Section 1 are going their separate ways. It’s very depressing. The three musketeers in the story have parted, and I feel their pain. Also, the magic of your first year is gone. You know how bright and shiny everything seems when you’re new. I mean, hell, tons of reading seems like this new adventure. Lately, instead of marveling at the magic that is Cumberland, I find myself counting the days until I don’t have to deal with rambling professors, unorganized casebooks, and expensive supplements. I miss the magic, I miss the three musketeers, I miss Section 1.

Goodbye Mobile

2005-08-20T22:49:00.000-07:00

I know, I know... I suck! It's been almost a month since my last blog, and since I've heard that some of you are actually having trouble sleeping without first reading my ramblings, I guess it's high time I got back on the ball.

Well, as you may have guessed, my time in Mobile is over and I'm back in Birmingham. I actually REALLY miss Mobile. It was wonderful spending that much time with my family. It makes me wish on some level that I had grown up there, if only for the relationship with my grandparents that my cousins who DO live there are now able to enjoy. One of the bigger highlights came toward the end when my Grandma and I met my Dad for the Jordan family reunion. First of all, I don't even wanna talk about the food that was there! I think I gained 5 lbs that afternoon. Southern cooking by a bunch of old ladies trying to impress people they haven't seen in a year... YUM!

After the reunion we went to the cemetary to visit, among others, my Grandaddy Jordan (not the grandady i've talked about before, this one was killed in an accident at the paper mill when my dad was 12), Uncle Ben, and my cousin Kyle. Have you ever seen your dad cry? I've seen mine cry a decent number of times, but it always put me in awe for some reason. I guess it's just because you always see your Dad as this strong rock and when you see him cry, it kinda shakes your world a bit... but not in a bad way... just in a way that makes that moment more powerful. I don't know if that makes sense. Anyway, just to set the stage... after my dad's dad died, he spent pretty much every summer at Uncle Ben's farm (his dad's brother). I wouldn't say Uncle Ben helped raise him or anything, but when you spend that many summers doing that kind of manual labor, you form a special kind of bond i think. Also, I think my Dad started to relate the farm with his dad... feeling like the lessons Uncle Ben taught him would have been the same kind of thing his Dad would have taught him. My Dad's really never said anything like this, but this is just the impression I get from the way he talks about Uncle Ben and the farm. Two years ago my dad's cousin Kyle (Uncle Ben's son) had an accident with a gun and was shot in the head. A few months later my Uncle Ben died from cancer. Dad took both deaths very hard. I wasn't able to go to Uncle Ben's funeral. For whatever reason some of the cousins went hunting after the funeral, and my cousin Scott killed a turkey that afternoon. My Dad brought one of the feathers home for me and tied it to me rear view mirror, where it's been ever since. As we pulled away from the cemetary it fell down. Odd I thought. Dad said they were just waving goodbye.

After leaving there, we went to the farm, where we had some AWESOME ribs with my Aunt Paula (Ben's wife, Kyle's mom), aunt Agnes, Uncle Doug, and cousin Michael. Haha... Uncle Doug told my Dad that he had this great rib recipe that included a bottle of Canadian Mist... you put the ribs on the grill, open the bottle, and when the bottle's empty the ribs are ready to come off. I have to say the ribs were excellent, and by the looks of my Dad and uncle Doug... the Canadian Mist wasn't half bad either.

I truly love my Uncle Ben's farm. It's one of my favorite places on earth. For starters, I think the place is absolutely gorgeous! There's really nothing special about the scenery, I just think it has this natural beauty to it. My Dad, Michael and I went driving around in Michael's truck to go put some corn in the feeder toward the back of the farm. One of the dogs was in the back of the pickup, we were bouncing over hills, it was almost dusk, and some gorgeous purple rain clouds were looming over the trees. Awesome. It was simply awesome. And even while diong some everyday little chore, my Dad was fighting to hide his smile, and how much he was enjoying the task. I can't wait till I have kids and can send them there with my Dad to learn how to fish in the pond my uncle made, affectionately calling it "The Little Boys' Pond." Ic an't wait to send them there for a summer so Michael can show them how to run the tractors and Aunt Paula can show my daughter how to can. (sigh) Anyway, that's a long ways off... but I do hope that someday I can share the special feeling I get when I visit that place, and how close I feel to my family, my history... to my soul.

And so it goes

2005-07-28T06:51:00.000-07:00

Hey cool cats!

Not much to write these days. Saraland has a nice relaxing feel to it, but I guess that doesn't make for very interesting posts huh? Here's a funny stpry for you, taht I had thought about just keeping to myself, but Scott has already threatened to blackmail me with it, so i guess i better just com clean. Have any of you seen that Vonage commercial where the guy falls off the back of the treadmill? Remember how i've been goin down to my aunt Betty's to run on her treadmill? Yep, you guessed it... Amanda took a pretty nasty and certainly embarrassing spill last night. The worst part is that now I have these nasty bruises where I really did hit my knee pretty hard. Oh well.... just naother thing to solidify how much of a tool i am. What else is new?

I had lunch with Hayden on tuesday. He was driving through Mobile on his way from BAton Rouge (school) to Moultrie, GA (parents house). Hayden and I dated off an on, long distance, from our senior year in high school till our sophomore year in college. And since then we have been really good friends. It's nice, because too often we lose what we build with our significant other. I know i've lost people in my life because we decide we shouldn't date anymore. That's such a shame, because you should be able to change the nature of your relationship from romnatic to plutonic... it shouldn't have to be all or nothing. (Can I get a "what what!" here Jen?) It's so nice with Hayden. I'll admit, every time I know I'm going to see him I get nervous, have to make sure I look nice... you know, all the normal stuff you do when you're going to see your "ex." It's funny though, because as soon as I see him, I become at ease, the petty stuff doesn't matter... and we truly do slip right into our friendship. And then all through lunch/dinner/coffee i sit there and think about how foolish i was to do my silly girl routine, and how fortunate I am to have salvaged such a great relationship with him. I guess you could say he "gets me," and only a handful of people really understand me this well. Trust me, I'm not trying to claim that I'm a complicated woman... no it's really just more of a strangeness... complicated would be cool... yeah, "strangeness" fits me better. And when I get the opportunity to see him I re-realize that he'll always understand me in this way, and I'd like to tink I understand him in this way too. It's nice to have a friend that you know will stop whatever he's doing to help you. I'm fortunate enough to have more friends fall into this category than I deserve.

Now onto Scott for a bit, and then I'll go research some admiralty law. Scott started his training for his new job this week. For those of you who missed the "Yea Scott" post, he just got a new job as the Banquet Set-Up Supervisor at Bham's newest fancy schmancy hotel. Here's the link if you wanna see it: www.rossbridgeresort.com I haven't beenthere yet, but if it's anything like this site, it look pretty tight to me. The golf course and the landscape look gorgeous, and the interior looks very impressive as well. Anyway, so training started this week, and I think he's really enjoying it. All the other manageers are about his age, and most of them are guys. It's good for him to have some friends of his own instead of always hanging out with mine. Don't get me wrong, you guys rock, but if it were me... I would want to hang out at least SOME people that I met myself instead of friends of a friend who never shut the hell up about law school! you know, it always makes you feel good to have "your own friends." He hasn't said anything really about these new guys, but I can tell from his voice that he's excited to have buddies. Monday night they surprised the group with a putting contest out on the golf course. Scott won, and while I'm very excited because I'm sure this made him feel good... I ain't gonna lie, I'm FAR more excited about the 2 night stay at the Grand Hotel in point clear that he won! Hell Yeah!

Missing Everyone... and while I'm not exactly looking forward to classes, I can't wait to be back in Bham with my posse!

The Jig Is Up

2005-07-21T13:47:00.000-07:00

Pierson's identity is known! For those of you wondering... it's Scott Warrick... better known as our very own "Silver Fox." For those of you who knew all along and were secretly snickering behind my back as I tortured myself trying to figure out who it was: Damn you! And for the record... He was like my second guess people!! But SOMEONE told me it wasn't him. I think that was you Wes, but Scott swears up and down that you phrased it in such a way that you didn't say it wasn't him. Regardless, in some way, somebody communicated to me that it was NOT him. So Fooey to you all!!

Speaking of the blogger life.. one of my recent entries, "Hottie McHotterson" got me put on probation. ALSO for the record, Scott (mine) NEVER reads my blog, so I thought i was safe in sharing about my office visitor. Whoops. Probation sucks! He didn't really care, but he made me go without a tuck-in for a whole night!

Well the latest news from Mobile is that Grandma and I got our nails done the other day. I never thought there was any such thing as a "bad manicure," but I was proven wrong when I visited Kim's Nails. I mean I've had manicurists do a bad job in that the polish wasn't put on very neatly, or the filing wasn't very straight.. but never an UNPLEASANT manicure. This was the worst one I've ever had in my life! They closed at 7. We got there at 6:05 ... and by 6:20 we were done! I know you ladies can relate. I felt rushed through, violated even! In fact, I felt nail-raped! (Yes, Mike I know you can have some fun with that term, but just keep it to yourself okay? ;-) )

Two funny stories and then I'll leave you:
1. I was reading a case today about two men that fell at work and were injured really badly. (no, htat's not the funny part... i'm getting there). And I started laughing out loud at my desk because their wives filed derivative suits for "lack of services." Haha, I guess if I suddenly wasn't getting any play from the hubby I'd wanna sue somene too!
2. My Grandma was telling me about her neighbor yesterday, a little old lady that lives by herself. Apparently someone was cautioning her the other day about living alone. They asked her what she would do if a strange man came to the door...wouldn't she be scared? To which she replied, "Well I guess I'd just have to get my shot gun and make him come in!"

A Good Weekend

2005-07-18T11:04:00.000-07:00

Compared to last weekend's hurricane adventure, this weekend was quite relaxing. Scott got to town about 7 Friday night and we stuffed ourselves full of Grammy's chicken and dumplins, lima beans, corn bread, and blue berry/peach cobbler. Then we headed over to Aunt Pam's to see my cousin's baby, Maggie, who was staying with my Aunt for a few days. I love that kid! She's quite possibly the cutest little girl I've ever seen, and I've always thought so. I've been trying to get her to say, "Manda" whle I'm here, but so far the closest thing I've gotten is "Dandy." She ws pretty hesitant around Scott.. I don't blame her... he IS 6'4. If I were a kid I wouldn't go near him either. But by the end of the night she was running over to him on the couch and hugging his leg. Scott and I stayed up late watching TV and helping oursleves to another round of cobbler (Hey man, I'm on vacation!). I fell asleep on the couch and when he woke me up so that we could go to our respective beds I saw that he had already cleaned up the cobbler dishes. Ah, a man that can do dishes... SWOON!

We slept till 11 on Saturday. Woke up and had more dumplins for lunch. We lounged around most of the day, went out to the shop to talk with Grandaddy, but stayed inside most of the time because it was so dadgum hot. We decided to go to a movie that night, but SCott had promised Grandma last weekend that he would cook for her when he came down here, so first he had to make dinner. We ran to FoodWorld, and he made chicken broccoli casserole for us. MMmmmm, the three of us ate it ALL!! It was so freaking good. I think Grandma was excited to have someone cooking other than her.

We drove across the bay to go to the Rave theater, and saw "Wedding Crashers." It was a pretty good movie. Very funny, I was laughing the whole time. Then we went over to Books A Million and got our copy of Harry Potter!! I'm very excited to read it, but Scott took it home with him first because he'll have it read in 3 days and it'll take me a few months to find the time to read the whole thing. We got home about midnight, and took a little walk down Grammy's street. Then we settled down for some more TV, and SURPRISE! I fell asleep again... whooda thunk it?

Slept late again on Sunday. Grandma took us for seafood... we could not stand any more food but grammy was treating so it was hard to say no. Scott hung aruond the house till about 2 before he headed back to Bham. I miss him already. I'm such a dork.

I was telling Jennifer this the other day, and I actually told Scott this weekend too and he seemed to like hearing it... but I have so much comfort in Scott. It's not a habitual kind of comfort-zone comfort... but there's a safety, a warm security in our relationship. I'm happiest, and most at ease when I'm with him. And like that cheesy line from "As Good As It Gets," He makes me want to be a better person. The great part about it though is that while he makes me want to succeed, he's also the reason why I know it's okay to fail.. because i know he'll accept me even with my failures, and he'll be the first one to pick me up, brush me off, and give me the pep talk I need to go try again. He said he like that I felt that comfort with him, and that he felt it was important to have a strong element of friendship in a realtionship, and that I was his best friend. That was nice to hear.

Sorry, I know you're bored with the mushiness by now. I'll leave you with this song though. I've been listening to it since Friday. I guess it really reflects how I'm feeling lately. If you want to try to download it, it's by full Fathom Five and it's called "Going Home." You may have some trouble finding it because they're a local Athens band. I encourage you to look though.

"I remember thinking,
I'd have to keep my eyes open just a little longer,
So I could look at your face,
And lock it up inside my mind,
So anytime I close my eyes I can draw you back to life.
"And now I'm driving toward you
And I can see you in my mind clear as day,
You're waiting for me as I have waited for you for so long...
But right now as I leave this place
Going to you,
It feels like I'm gong home,
Yeah, It feels like I'm going home."

Fun Times

2005-07-15T12:12:00.000-07:00

Just another week in Mobile. Nothing too exciting happening here... but I catch myself entertained by... well just the simple things I guess. I've described some of them for you.

1) Grandma was trying to kill a fly. She hit it, he went down, we thought it was dead, but then it flew off again. Whilke trying to say that she had only stunned it, I just though her wording was so funny... "Oh durn! I just knocked him crazy!"

2) I've been trying to work out a lot while I'm here. Tuesday night I went over to my Aunt Betty's house (I say "aunt," but she's my grandma's sister). So I'm running on her treadmill and what's ont he wall in front of me staring me right in the face? That's right, a big ol' fish that my uncle Jerrel caught and had mounted. So now I'm running my butt off and i'm staring right into a fish's mouth... it kinda freaked me out.

3) While at Aunt Betty's, she and my grandma wanted to show me their exercise tape called "Silver Fox." For starters, it's a Richard Simmons video. And it's called the SILVER fox because it's him and all these famous people's elderly parents. Like it has Stalone's mom, and Farrah Faucet's mom... and some other people I didn't recognize. So I'm watching my grandma and my Aunt Betty do this tape, synchronized and everything... and I'm trying my hardest not to laugh, and my Aunt says, "I've done this video for 3 years and all it's ever done is make me hungry!"

That's pretty much it. Scott's coming tonight. I'm SO excited!!! :-)

Hottie McHotterson!

2005-07-13T07:50:00.000-07:00

Great Day in the Mornin' my boss just brought his nephew into work and that boy is HOT! I think he's in highschool though, but a soccer player, and you know what that means ladies! I should SO be in jail for the thoughts I'm having right now! OW OW!!

You Don't Have to Live Like a Refugee - Tom Petty

2005-07-13T07:14:00.000-07:00

I survived my first Mobile hurricane! Go me. Grandma and I elt like refugess all weekend! We left here for Bham about 2:30. With everyone trying to get out of town, what's normally a 3.5 hour drive turned into 6 hours! It was awful. We went out to dinner at P.F. Chang's Friday night with Sarah. Grandma had never had Chinese before, so this was a big deal. I think she was about to fall asleep at the table. It was way past her bedtime at that point. At dinner Sarah gave me the new Natural Glow Daily Moisturizer by Jergens. Have you ladies seent his? www.jergens.com It's amazing!! Apparently it was onOprah not too long ago. It doesn't streak, it works really well, and it's basicaly fool proof. I've been using it for only a week and I can already see a major difference. Sarah went all over town looking for it because they're sold out everywhere. She finally found a poor stock boy who was unloading a box while getting attacked by pale women, and got me a bottle while she was at. So here's to you Ms. Hunt-all-over-town-looking-for-a-way-to-keep that-natural-glow-while-still-avoiding-cancer-Gal! My melonin, and my new found confidence while wearing today's skirt, both thank you!

Grandma and I stayed in Bham until sunday morning when my Dad freaked out that tornados from hurricane fedder bands were gonig to hit us in Bham and forced Grandma and I to drive 3 hrs east to Atlanta. Now, I know we could have gone 20 mins down the road to my cousin tim's house who has basement... but what can I say? My Dad's crazy. I have to admit it was nice to see the parents. Plus, i got to see my dog, Lacy, too. I was able to take her for a walk/jog int he park, and man did she love it! I did a mile, and wanted tot do another one, but LAcy was thirstya nd wasn't really digging drinking bottled water that I was pouring into my hand for her. So I took her home to lap up some good ol' tap water and lay on top of the air vent in the kitchen.

Monday grandma and I headed back for Mobile. What is nomally a 5 hour drive turned into hours. So by the end of the weekend I had spent 17hrs in the car with my Grandma and quite frankly I was baout ready to drive us both into a ditch. Don't get me wrong, I love my Grammy, but she serioulsy was driving me crazy! Every sign we passed she would read outloud... "Mobile, 71 miles." And every guy that would cut me off she would scream, "He's on drugs!" By the end of it I was so stressed out, taht a truck cut me off and I yelled, "You shithead!" I felt so bad and apologized to Grammy for swearing. But then, this little old lady who i don't think has ever had a dropof alcohol in her life said, "That's okay, baby... when we get home I may just have to get into Grandaddy's stash and fix you a drink!"

I'll try and post again later today.

A Storm's A Comin' !!

2005-07-08T08:43:00.000-07:00

I'm at work now. I just finished an assignment and I'm waiting for the boss man to get off the phone so i can give it to him. I don't think we'll be here very long today. Everybody's trying to get out of town before the hurricane hits. My Grandma, her sister, and I are going to head to my apt in Birmingham. Grammy's never seen my place, or school, so I think she's actually kind of looking forward to it.

Now for some of the Grandma antics i promised you. It's really hard to explain... you really just have to be around her. She's your typical old lady... she worries like it's her job, she doesn't trust doctors or the bank, she can cook so well it'll make your head spin, she pitches a fit if you don't take the $20 she snuck in your pocket, she's so scatterbrained that it's hard to keep up with her, but most of all she loves her grandbabies. It's amazing how selfless this woman is! Last night it took about 5 minutes to convince her that she did NOT get a better ear of corn than I did... she always gives the "best" to the other person.

She 's so funny too. I'm all the time catching her doing old lady exercises... she'll do bicep curls with a can of beans, and will stand at the sink washing dishes all the time kicking her legs up behind her and telling me she's working on her "rear end." The other morning she woke up and did aerobics with denise austin. And, I didn't know this, but every week she takes a weight training class at the civic center. I mean, it's pretty low impact since all the people are older, but still... you go grammy! Yesterday she went to her first line dancing class, and I about died laughing when I caught her practicing her steps later that night. Like I said though, you really just have to meet this woman. She's just adorable. You don't need any other entertainment when she's around.

Last night was "girl's night out" with my cousin Paige and her friend Elizabeth. Now keep in mind, Paige is married now with a 1.5 yr old, so we couldn't go too crazy. Our night started off at Walmart, where Elizabeth was trying to run into some guy she thought liked her. We met up with him and he showed us his new truck (welcome to saraland, alabama). He was pretty cute though... nice eye candy ;-) Even better eye candy came later when we met some other guy Elizabeth was interested in and his buddies at the Waffle House. Their tire had run over soemthing and they were trying to change a flat. Mmm mmm... i LOVE me some boys getting greasy around cars! Scott can never figure out why I like to watch him work on hiscar.. but you ladies know what I'm talking about!

For whatever reason we decided to dye my hair last night too. I've been saying for a while that I wanted some subtle auburn highlights, and when I metnioned it to Scott one time you should have seen his little ear perk up. We found a box that washes out in 28 shampoos, so I was down with that. When we finished and dried it, I think you really can't tell. Paige, Elizabeth, and grandma say they can see it though. I guess you all can be the judge when you run into me.

Okay, better get back to work.

From Sunny Mobile!!!

2005-07-06T20:03:00.000-07:00

Hey Kids!! I know it's been forever since I've written, so sit back and enjoy a long one!

Well, Scott and I went to ATL for the 4th. It was my Dad's bday, so Scott and I went there to visit him. Saturday night we played trivia with our two families. That was fun because, believe it or not, they've only met one other time. We were in like 11th place and put all our points on the last question, and took 2nd! Go Jordan-Millers! Sunday night Scott and I went to the Ritz on Lake Oconee, where he used to work, to see the fireworks show. We met a bunch of his old work friends up there. It was really nice to see them too. I hadn't seen them in about a year. We ate over-priced hamburgers, drank some beer, sat in the hotel wating for the rain to quit, and drove out of the parking lot just as they decided it was dry enough to set off the fireworks. Oh well, still a good time.

Monday morning my Mom ran in the Peachtree Road Race. For those of you not from Hotlanta (I've notived that everyone in Mobile calls it that, but I've never heard anyone from atlanta call it that), the Road Race is a 6 mile run put on every 4th of July by the city. It's this really huge deal, and everyone gets tshirts and hangs out in teh city afterward. Anyway, my mom left early to go run that (not bad for a 52 yr old!), and I met her, my Dad, and two of their friends afterward for lunch at Houston's, where I had possibly the best turkey sandwich of my life!

After lunch I hit the road to Mobile, which is about 5 hours away. It wasn't as bad as I expected though. I got to myAunt's hosue about dinner time, and there was a huge picnic spread, complete with homemade peach ice cream!! MMMMMMmmmmm!!! I hung out with the fam and then Grandma and I went to her house so I could go to bed.

Tuesday (yesterday) was my first day of work. The office is this too-cute little brick house, that I am totally in love with. I walk in, and probably the second sentence out of the paralegal's mouth (Angie), is " I don't know why Jeff told you to come in today... Tuesday's golf day!" And boy was she right. Jeff was in for all of 2 hours, long enough to dictate a memo to Angie about what he wanted me to do, and the other partner, Eaton, didn't come in at all. What a life! Jeffrey is hillarious by the way, and I really think I'm gong to like working for him. He's very laid back, seems to be very patient, and I can tell he's a really good lawyer. The whole office in general is very relaxed. I was by far the most dressed up one there, and i have a feeling it's going to stay that way. Jefferey came in in shorts, a collared shirt, and flip flops. The paralegal had on a little linen outfit, and the runner/web designer/computer technician/bookkeeper/lawn care guy (i'm really not kidding with this title!) had on a collared shirt and jeans. I'm thinking... this rocks! Normal people that realize you don't have to be in a suit to work efficiently! Everyone was very intelligent, and got their work done, but were just so pleasant and friendly!

Today I had a little more work to do. I finished with the memo (think short paper) I was writing for Jeff. Funny little story... I told Jeff that I had included all the cases and statute that I had cited in the file along with the memo. I figured with them being such a casual firm he may not care if I didn't bother to blue book it (think MLA handbook for lawyers). When I asked him if he wanted me to, he just laughed and said he was impressed that I had even bothered to ask.

So yeah... I think I'm gonna like working for cousin's firm. I'm really looking forward to my time in Mobile. I'll try to write more tomorrow about the antics with Grandma. That woman is hillarious!!

Church, Running, and Turtles

2005-06-30T08:42:00.000-07:00

One more thing I forgot to tell you about the hearing yesterday... We're nearing the court house, and there's this big beautiful white church, and then right next to it is the gorgeous white court house. There's about 10ft between the two buildings, and my lawyer (Charles) says, "hey look at that patch of grass between the buildings here.. you know what that is?... The separation between church and state!" Haha...okay, probably not that funny, but I was dying.

**************************************************
Look what I found on the front page of Montgomery's newspaper today!
This is the hearing I went to.
http://www.montgomeryadvertiser.com/NEWSV5/storyV5bingo30w.htm

*****************************************************************

Speaking of dying, i went running yesterday. Wow. I've been working out a decent amount lately (usually on the elyptical though), but for whatever reason the running totally kicked my ass! I jogged/walked for about 30 mins. I would walk for about 3:30, then jog until i had to stop. I averaged about 1 min of jogging for each interval. How Pathetic!!!! this only further confirmed my self-bestowed nickname of "fatty fatty 2x4." I really want to learn to like this though, because if I'm going to be out exercising the new puppy i might as well be combining it with my workout time. I'm going to keep up this same routine i think, until the jogging intervals get longer and longer and I'm eventually jogging the whole 30 mins. If any of you runners out there have a better idea for how to start out though, PLEASE let me know.

My path was really pretty though. I went around the campus some then through some pseudo woods with a little pond (or drainage ditch... same diff) then onto a baseball field, around the outfield and aroung the bases a couple times, and then back to the dorm. While I was in the pseudo woods, I walked up on this tree, and noticed this MASSIVE turtle by the trunk. It had gone into its shell but I kid you not, the think was at least as big as my face. I walked closer to it, starting to think about how pretty nature was, and how amazing it was that I just stumbled ont his thing... and then I noticed the turtel wasn't in his shell... it had died and his body had basically rotted so that now only the shell was left. yeah, so that pretty much RUINED my nature nirvana. I decided, however, that i would prefer to think of him as simply tired of his one bedroom apartment and having upgraded to a duplex somewhere on the west side.

YAY Scott!!!!

2005-06-29T13:52:00.000-07:00

YAY!!!! Scott got the job that he's been after for months! I'm so happy for him, and so proud. They told him when he sent his resume in early they had pretty much decided to give him the job, even before they had interviewed him. So now I have to eat crow, because I've been after him, telling him he wasn't doing enough and being aggressive enough. But anyway, I'm so happy for him. He's really excited about the position (and perhaps even more excited about making double what he thought he was going to be making). Also, this hotel is right by school which means we can maybe meet for lunch some days. So... yippeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So today I went to a hearing in Hayneville with two of my lawyers. I felt like I had entered Mayberry!!! I walked in the courtroom and there was a "cell" in the corner for the prisoners to stay while they're being tried i guess. I looked for Barny Pheiff to be sitting next to it, but I guess he hadn't arrived yet. This particular case is apparently a pretty big one, and usually is reserved an entire day in court, and therefor the only case on the docket. So we thought we'd be out of there by 10. Boy were we wrong.

The docket was more like a cattle call, and at 11:45 we STILL hadn't even been called, let alone finished arguing. We saw some crazy cases though, that further confirmed my sense of Mayberryness. In particular, there was as case about a woman who was injured while breeding horses. I was out of the room at this point (sent across the street to the BP to get us all crackers to tide us over till lunch) so I don't know the specifics of how she was injured... I probably don't want to know either. My day was complete when I walked into the BP, and was greeted by the large woman, about my age, in hot pink velour sweat pants, a spandex white tank that was about 5 sizes too small, and barefoot (oh yeah she was)!!

Anyways, it was a fun day. SO now I think I'm gonna sneak out of work 30 mins early, and try to force myself to run. Motivation: new prospirit running shorts that i got for $5.50 at Target. Odd how the pride in my purchase motivates me to do something i loathe. Have a great one everybody!!!

I looked like a Hooker

2005-06-24T05:51:00.000-07:00

So let me paint a little picture of last night for you. I'm gong to a wedding on Saturday and want to wear these shoes that could possibly kill me. The heels are about 2 inches, and as I am only accustomed to a 1 inch heel, this new endeavor may be beyond my grasp. SO, I decided I needed to practice walking in them last night if i hoped to have any chance of wearing these shoes on Saturday. I straped on the shoes and went outside to walk aaround on the gravel and scratch them up. Then I took a walk around the AUM campus with these two inch heels on, hoping to break them in. Now perhaps this wouldn't have been so bad if I had been wearing a dress or something, but, as it was about 11pm, I was in khaki shorts and a navy Bob Barr, "I'm a Barr Belle" t-shirt. That's right, I looked like a cheap hooker. Not only did I look like a cheap hooker... but in my khaki's and shirt promoting a hugely right-wing congressional candidate, i looked like a cheap hooker from the burbs!

Prison, Thighs, and Pizza

2005-06-22T08:47:00.000-07:00

So the prison tour yesterday was pretty interesting. The prisoners were a lot calmer than i expected. They didn't really mess with us too much, and the cat calls were kept to a minimum. Which, sadly enough, made me think i was so unattractive that even deprived inmates wouldn't have me. I guess that means i accomplished my goal though. I had dressed in a man's shirt, tennis shoes, my hair ina bun, and no makeup.

I was happy to see how self-sufficient the prison was. They grow most of their own food. The people that work in the kitchen, library, and even the medical wing (orderlies) were all inmates. they had some luxuries like basketballs and maybe one or two televisions... but I always thought that stuff was paid for with tax dollars and it turns out that it's paid for with the prisoners's money from the sales at the canteen. So anyway, I was pretty impressed. There was a very good balance... uncomfortable, but still humane. Two thumbs up!

In other news... I think I've pulled both of my inner thigh muscles. And yes, I know how that sounds. I was at the gym on those machines, think thigh-master, but sitting up (you know the ones i'm talking about ladies). Anyway, I guess I must have had too much weight on it, because this is not just the kind of pain you get when you've worked really hard. These are pulled. I can barely walk, and when I do it looks like i've been riding a horse all day! It's awful!

Lastly, i came into work late today. This morning I woke up and my stomach was killing me. I tried to eat some cereal to settle it, but that didn't help. I was basically done getting ready when i decided I just felt to bad to go in. So I had my roomie tell my boss i'd be in at 10 instead. I'm here now, but I still feel like crap. My 2nd roomie's stomach hurt too. We're thinking maybe the pizza we ordered from pizza hut wasn't good.

Narrowed Dog List

2005-06-20T06:32:00.000-07:00

Happy Monday everybody!!

I had a great weekend. The trial competition is over so I was finally able to spend some quality time with Scott. We just laid around all weekend, watching movies and cleaning his apt, which I more than help to destroy every time i'm there. Probably the highlight of our weekend was saturday afternoon. We went to look at puppies, as always, then we had dinner at cracker barrell (mmmmmm), and a trip to wal-mart. Yep, we lead thrilling lives. you can be jealous... it's okay ;-)

Well, Dad (or better known as Head Bunny to some of you) pared down some of the dog list, and then added a few of his own that he felt i had overlooked. Now we're left with the Braques du Boubonnais, Cajun Squirrel Dog, Blue Lacy, German Short Haired Pointer, Vizsla, Nova Scotia Duck Tolling Retriever (whew! that's a mouth full!), Russian Spaniel, Welsh Springer Spaniel, and the Mountain Feist. So... I'm down to 10 breeds instead of 11... still have some narrowing to do. Plus, Dad took out the Lab Retriever.. but I'm still considering it. Proabbly the next category to exclude some breeds will be cost. Favor: especially for those of you who don't live in B'ham right now, if you think about it take a look in your paper and see if you see any of these dogs in the classifieds and how much they cost. But ONLY if you happen to think about it... don't go out of your way.

Wanted to get up this morning and go to my first spinning class. But I laid awake in bed till 2 last night, so gettting up at 5 just wasn't happening. Ticked too, because i was kinda looking forward to it.

Okay, well I better get back to work... or start to work... same diff.

Rock the Vote

2005-06-16T08:37:00.000-07:00

Okay, so I've mentioned how I'm trying to get a dog at teh end of the summer... and I've been trying to find a good breed. I'vementioned german short haired pointers and boxers... but i found this website with a ton of different breeds and found some other possible choices, and "I WANT YOU" to help me decide. I'm in an apt so i can't have anything huge, but if i got one of those little yappy dogs that's so small it might as well be a hampster i think i would shoot myself. plus I want something that could be a bit of a guard dog, and the breed gets double points for being able to take it hunting. So vote your conscience!

The main website you need to go to is http://www.dogbreedinfo.com/photosearch.htm

I’ve made a list of the breeds I like though and put their specific links here too.

Telomian: http://www.dogbreedinfo.com/telomian.htm
Cajun Squirrel dog: http://www.dogbreedinfo.com/cajunsquirreldog.htm
Blue Lacy: http://www.dogbreedinfo.com/bluelacy.htm
Boxer: http://www.dogbreedinfo.com/boxer.htm
Labrador retriever: http://www.dogbreedinfo.com/labrador.htm
Pointer: http://www.dogbreedinfo.com/pointer.htm
Vizsla: http://www.dogbreedinfo.com/vizsla.htm
Portugese Pointer: http://www.dogbreedinfo.com/perdigueiroportugueso.htm
Plott Hound: http://www.dogbreedinfo.com/plotthound.htm
German Short-Haired Pointer: http://www.dogbreedinfo.com/germanshorthairedpointer.htm
Braque du Bourbonnais: http://www.dogbreedinfo.com/braquedubourbonnais.htm
Treeing Tennesee Brindle: http://www.dogbreedinfo.com/treeingtennesseebrindle.htm
American Pit Bull Terrier http://www.dogbreedinfo.com/americanpitbull.htm
( after listing all the other dogs, I took a “perfect dog quiz,” and the APBT was the only that came up that i liked)

Huevos Rancheros con Queso!!

2005-06-13T13:46:00.000-07:00

Well, hello there loyal readers!! Yse i realize it's been a long time. Bear with me though, i don't have net access execpt at work, and when i'm home on the weekends i'm too busy to blog because I'm running around with all of you!!

So, what's new with me you ask? Well Louise and I spent the past two weekends doing a trial competition. It was really fun, but I wish I had advanced. I think I'd really like to get more involved with it though.

Last weekend jen came, and it rocked! man i love when she comes to town. She didn't bring Bailey this time though, and I really missed him! That's okay though, soo I will have a pup of my own. Speaking of which... I'm still focusing on a german short haired pointer, but now i've alos got my eye on a boxer.

I've recently discovered a meal that is SO easy to make and I think I could eat it all the time!! Scramble 2 brown eggs (you laugh about the brown part, but my roomate turned me on to them and i have to say i really can taste the difference) and at the last second sprinkle in some grated mozz cheese (the least fat of all cheeses don't ya know) and at the very very last second mix in about 3 tblspoons of chunky salsa. It's really good, and aa great way to pack in protein, low-fat dairy, and a veggie serving all first thing in the morning!

Something else i've been kinda thinking about lately... One of the biggest things that has kept me sane during my life is a firm belief that God has a plan for me, and it's something that really needs doing or He wouldn't have gone to the trouble of keeping me around all these years. I'm not joking... i'm not the brightest crayon in the box, and tend to get myself into dangerous situations... with my stupidity, i should SO be dead by now. But I'm still here, and I really believe there's something I'm supposed to do. But do you ever feel like maybe God picked the wrong person for the job? Sometimes, I worry that i'm not going to be able to do what He's got picked out for me. What if I can't live up to whatever it is He's got planned? Then everyone else will have done their jobs to keep the world turning, but i will have failed and let the whole world down by not doing my part.

Men are from mars

2005-06-02T18:26:00.000-07:00

I'll get to the next london installment at some point... but for now, just a few things:

1) HAD to go out to eat tonight. I've noticed lately that dining out alone, is a really nice stress reliever for me. I just sit with my magazine and have some smiling person bring me a diet coke. What is it about having someone bring you things that makes you feel so good?

2) There are only 2 girl law clerks in the AG's office, and the other one is always away at trials... so for all ractical purposes, i'm the only one witha bunch of boys. I guess it's been a while since i've been submerged in so much testtosterone... not since i was a little sister at scott's fraternity, hanging around the frat house all the time have i been around exclusively men, and i have to say that you guys are just such different creatures!!! I sometimes forget how different our minds are. I can't really explain in detail why it's different, you guys just have a different repoir with each other that sometimes i feel i don't understand. Your humor is different, the way you solve problems is different, even the way you compliment each other is different. MAkes you wonder how a man and a woman can go together so well, and yet still have so much about the other gender that we will never understand.

London # 3

2005-05-31T07:11:00.000-07:00

Yeah, Yeah,... i know it's been a while. Keep in mind that I don't have interenet access in my dorm that i'm living in here in the gorgeous metropolis of montgomery.

Okay, so memorial day weekend went pretty well. Saw one of my favorite people get marreid on Saturday. The wedding was outside on the bank of the 'Hooch, and it was beautiful. Quite possibly the best wedding I've ever been to. Everything screamed Natalie (the girl), right down to the mac n cheese served at the reception. The whole thing was very relaxed but very classy... which is natalie to a T.

Oh... and during the ceremony, the minister was talking about God's marriage covenant and said, "Now a covenant is different than a contract..." and started defining both. And of course my twisted little law student mind started running down the definition of a contract. I didn't even have to say any thing to Scott, he knew... before I realized what i was doing he leans over and whispers, "stop it." Why am i so warped?

Jennifer is coming up this weekend, and I'm ALREADY excited!! We have so much fun together. So just bear with me if you talk to me this week, I'm sure I'll mention this fact about 20 times.

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Okay, so the thrid day in London was equally relaxed. We got up early again to go wait on the half-price tickets, and this time the computers were cooperating. We got tickets for "Saturday Night Fever," complete with all the Bee Gees music. My mom was stoked to say the least. Then we hopped back on our hop on- hop off bus because our 24hours hadn't run out yet, and made our way to the British Library. They had some really cool stuff in there.

There was a copy of the magna carta... i thought there was just the one document, but apparently that's not the case. ABck then they made copies of it, but not many, and started circulating it. There's only like 3 of the original copies in the world, 2 of them are in england, and 1 of those was the one we saw. It was pretty cool to be staring at the document that helped to shape so many societies. They also had tons of other cool stuff. There was a collection of significant Bibles, including the first one ever translated into English, the first one ever printed, etc. Handel's "Messiah" was there on its origingal score. There were original copies of various books, including Alice in Wonderland, complete with the little drawings he had drawn in the margins of the notebook he hhad written in. And perhaps most important, there were multiple Beatles' songs lyrics on the backs of napkins, and birthday cards, whatever the guys could gtet their hands on when the song popped in their heads. Thought that was pretty cool. I love those guys.

After the library (which we had walked around for 20 blocks looking for after getting off the bus) we caught a cab back to our hotel. Quick shower, and then off to the theater. The show was really good, but I think mom enjoyed it more than I did because I only knew a couple of the songs and she knew every word to all of them. I have to say though, if you've ever seen the movie you know that scene where Travolta is getting ready in his room to go dancing, well when the actor took his shirt off to change, that alone was worth the ticket price ladies!! MMmmm mmm, momma like!

London # 2 - Shorter

2005-05-24T11:56:00.000-07:00

Well, I was about to write something like “nothing much to report,” when I realized that was SO not true, because I DO have something to report!! I had my first day in court today! My lawyer, Jack, took me with him while he defended a government agency that will remain undisclosed (that’s right, I’m taking all those cheesy warnings seriously). I was having so much fun, it took everything I had not to lean over to the parties who had just been sued and say, “Isn’t this awesome!!??!!” But don’t worry, I restrained myself. Then we got taken to lunch. 2 out of the 3 days I’ve worked in this office I’ve been treated to lunch… I could get used to this.

London Entry #2:
Mom and I got up early the next morning and went and waited in line at this ticket place that sells theater tickets for half price for all the shows that night. Their computers were down and we waited forever before we finally gave up. Some people from mom’s office waited longer than we did for tickets, and they never got theirs either. After that we went around the corner and had a “full English breakfast,” which comes with eggs, ham, sausage, toast, coffee, and baked beans!
For the rest of the day we were pretty much worthless. We bought a ticket for one of those double-decker bus tours and just rode all over London. It was a hop on/hop off tour… but I have to say we didn’t do very much hopping. I was still jet lagged, and it was real cold and gloomy, so mom and I were happy as clams just to ride around and look at buildings, sight-see, and listen to the tour guide. If you’re ever in London, I would recommend this for the first day you’re there (Jill and Keith, yes this is part of the schedule I have set up for you ;-) ) It’s a great way to recover from the plane trip, get your bearings and learn the lay of the land, and you actually learn a lot of history just riding around. Plus, if you feel like getting off at one of the stops and actually DOING something, you can do that too.
We had dinner at this little Italian restaurant down an alley by our hotel. It was super good. English food basically blows, so mom and I ate a lot of Italian and Thai while we were there. Their Thai food is supposed to be some of the best. Then we bought a bottle of wine and went to bed early. Boring day maybe, but VERY relaxing.

London #1 - LONG

2005-05-23T13:21:00.000-07:00

Hello all!! Weekend was pretty good. Got a bunch of errands done, spent some good time with Scott. We went to look at the puppies again, but they weren’t there this weekend L Guess I’ll just have to wait. I don’t really have a whole lot else to report. Not really looking forward to going to work tomorrow because I’m still feeling totally unqualified to breathe the same air as these people, but at least my suit is pretty tomorrow. I know you gals out there can relate to how having a pretty outfit on can make an otherwise unbearable day seem not as bad. Other than that, I thought I’d go ahead and type out the first installment of the London blogs! (duhn duhn duhn!!) I don’t want to give them all to you at once, because that would be even longer than this already is, and this way I have a captive audience for a good week. Muah ha ha!! So here’s the first part:

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Sunday morning in London. It’s 7:30 and my mom’s not awake yet, so I though I’d write a bit. They’ve been predicting rain all week, but it’s another gorgeous morning… cold, but clear.
I landed Thursday morning @ 11:45, hopped on a train from the airport to Victoria Station inside London, and then one of those black cabs that have become one of London’s signatures, to the Royal Horse Guards Hotel, where my mom and all her peeps from work are staying. I think the cabby jipped me on the pound-euro exchange rate. Note: MUST learn to not be so trusting.
I walked in the lobby and three people ran over saying, “You must be Amanda, your mom just went to the restroom.” My mom has a habit of telling complete stranger her entire life story, and I guess that day her story included that she was waiting for me. She also probably asked them to grab me up if I walked in while she was gone. Guess she was afraid that if I walked in the lobby and didn’t see her that I’d turn around, walk out, and start roaming the streets of London looking for her.
Anyway, from there we headed out to see what we could see. We were both hungry so we stopped in a pub for some food. This was the same pub that Ashley and I had eaten in 2 summers ago after visiting Westminster Abbey! Crazy coincidence! After that we strolled through Covent Garden, which is an open-air market where you can buy pretty much anything as long as you have absolutely no use for it, you do have a use for it but the one ou find is terribly ugly, or… it’s incense. Then we walked over to Trafalgar Square which is where the National Gallery is, and then back to the hotel to get ready for dinner. I loved our hotel! Big thanks to mom’s company, and for the person who invented towel warmers!!
We were going out with a guy from my mom’s office and his wife, and a british woman they’ve been working with over the phone and her husband. The woman took us to this really great restaurant on top of the National Portrait Gallery. This is different from the National Gallery, which has all kinds of art. The National Portrait Gallery specializes in… well, figure that out yourself, you’re smart. So the restaurant – think The Sun Dial in atl, only it didn’t spin. But you could see the tops of buildings, and the huge statue of Horatio Nelson sticking up from Trafalgar Square.
The people we ate with were pretty interesting. The British woma, Karen, was really friendly, as was her husband… her MUCH younger and dare I say attractive husband. Go Karen! The guy who works with my mom, Larry was a big nerd, but one of those adorable nerds that you love to have around because they’re just so funny and nice. He was really into comic books. Heath, I told him your story about the batman contracts question, and he finished my sentence with, “They’re not even in the same univers!” Guess you’re not so weird after all ;-)
His wife, Myung-Hi, was really sweet, but a little hard to understand. Larry was really good though. He always made sure she had what she wanted to eat and drink. He had made an art out of repeating what she said so we could understand her, but in a way that was so tactful that it wasn’t like he was repeating her. He really took care of her. I really appreciate that in my own relationship, because let’s face it… I can be a bit naïve sometimes (shut up keith!), and Scott’s always looking out for me.
Oh, but I think the best one-liner out of the whole dinner conversation came from Mying-Hi. She was commenting to me on how everyone wears scarves here, and she said, “Yes, everyone here wears a scarf… so I bought three.” My kind of woman J

Workin' Girl

2005-05-21T20:30:00.000-07:00

Back from London!!! For those of you who experienced withdrawls: Rip off that patch! Screw that support group! Amanda "the sweet addiction" Jordan is back! I know what you all really missed is my modest and humble ways ;-)

I blogged everything about my London trip. Well, that is, i wrote it out on paper while i was there (pen and paper, i know, it's crazy talk!) but I have yet to type it out. Plus I've left the paper in Montgomery and i'm in b'ham right now, so i'll have to start that come monday. For now, i'll just let you know about how the Attorney General's office is treating me.

I don't think I like the work force... should that scare me? What I don't like about it i think is that the things I'm dong are actually being used!! I mean, in LLR, it was all just fake, but now my analysis can produce unwarranted costs to the state, determine the direction of cases, and even affect legislature. I mean, they do know I'm incompetent right? It scares the hell out of me thinking that people are taking my word for things, and making decisions based on what I say. I'm an idiot! I never know what I'm talking about! They really should know better than to think someone as gorgeous as myself could have any sort of intelligence. (Again with the modesty)

I would say the one plus in the whole gig is that, the attorney who supervises the four attorney's that i work for is out of the country for three weeks, so they've put me in her office, her HUGE office. That's right, the crummy little intern has an office twice the size of any of her bosses! Hehe, "Why certainly Mr. Attorney, come right into my office, that is if you can cross the room to my desk with out getting winded from walking such a massive distance. Can I offer you some water after your long journey?"

Leavin' on a jet plane...

2005-05-11T15:21:00.000-07:00

... except that i DO know when I'll be back again. I leave in a few hours for london to spend the week there with my mom, which i'm SUPER excited about. Last time I was there I was studying at Oxford, so it will be nice to see the sights this time without some paper nagging at me in the back of my mind.

I guess today is my first official day as a 2L. My last final was yesterday, so I'm considering myself "graduated." Last night we all went out for Jill' bday, and it was nice to see everyone one last time before we all go our separate ways for the summer.

a much more important fact for today: Scott's Birthday!!! I feel really bad leaving him on his birthday, but a couple of his buddies are driving over from atl, so he'll have some friends to keep him company. I'm sure the night will consist of a lot of mountain dew, pizza, retarded video games, scratching, and the occasional earth-shaking belch... you know, boy stuff. For the life of m e I will never understand why they find more exciting than going for a mani-pedi, eating a nice lunch and then spending the afternoon shopping, but whatever. If you feel like sending him an ecard (cuz i know you all care) his email is scott007m@yahoo.com

Okay, well I better get going. Dad's home (or Head Bunny to some of you) and we have to go to the airport. I packed a bok and some magazines for the plane... but honestly the last thing I want to do is read... do you think it would be bad (embarrassing) if I brought a coloring book? I would LOVE it if I could just veg out and color some garfield and odie... or maybe some disney princesses. Cheerio!!